This Love

Chapter 42

SCARLETT PARKER

I've always liked waking up in Manchester. Or, maybe it's not Manchester that I like so much, but rather it's waking up in the house Harry grew up in. It's so quiet both in and outside, and I'm so warm under the covers as I look out to see the full grey light and naked dead trees through the wide bedroom window.

Harry's bare back is facing me from how we fell asleep last night with me being the big spoon for once and I can tell that he's still sleeping with the way his ribs are slowly expanding and collapsing with the duvet halfway down his midsection. When I see his birthmark, I pull my hand out from under my pillow to start tracing the odd shape.

It's not long before I see little goosebumps rise on his skin, making me smile against my pillow as he inhales a bit of a deeper breath, but I move up to lay flush to his back again before he can roll over to face me. Even though I didn't mean to wake him up, I'm not upset to feel him holding my hand over his sternum.

"Are you sleeping?" I whisper close to the back of his neck.

"Mhm," he remains still as I pull the duvet up to cover us more and wiggle my toes against his ankles until he laughs softly and traps my leg in between his.

For a minute or two, I stay quiet and feel the way our breaths start to sync up with each other. It relaxes me enough that I feel like I might actually be able to fall asleep again, despite my craving for a cigarette, but then he asks me if I slept okay last night.

"I slept great," I stay in place while he pivots to turn on his side and face me, just barely opening his tired eyes.

"It's peaceful, huh?" He blinks slowly until his lashes come together again.

"Mhm," I try to move that stubborn piece of hair from his forehead just for it to fall back into place, but I keep running my fingers through the strands until I swear he's asleep again.

Then, seemingly out of nowhere, he says, "Last Christmas was hard without you. And so was the one before that."

I move closer to share his pillow with him until the tips of our noses are grazing. "Why?"

"Because everything is hard without you," he answers simply. "I really don't think you realize how often I thought of you when I was with Gabrielle even though I tried so hard to hate you."

The thought of Harry hating me breaks my heart, but sometimes I wonder if it would be easier if that were the case. God knows I would deserve it. "I hate to think of her in this bed with you. Makes me fucking sick."

His laugh brings a small smile to my face even though the image really does make me cringe. "This just feels like everything I've been missing. It feels right."

I nod at him as he opens his eyes to see me, sweeping my thumb back and forth over his cheekbone. "It's awfully cozy, I have to admit."

"Yeah?" He smirks and rolls over to lay on top of me until I start dramatically choking, though I've always welcomed the weight of him and he knows that. The feeling is the equivalent of having a weighted blanket.

"You're squishing me," I cough while wrapping my legs around him to keep him in place, which only makes him laugh into my neck before he supports himself with his palms digging into the cushy mattress, blinking down at me with that adoring look in his green eyes.

"Would you like some coffee?"

"Please," I whisper, watching him nod before he hangs his head for a soft kiss, and I let him struggle to untangle my legs from around him so he can get out of bed.