No Excuse

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The clock strikes twelve.

And barely a second later, I hear a knock on my door. Just as Mistress had let me know.

The woman stands there.

She's dressed in almost nothing. The gown she has on her shoulders is so thin that the candle she holds shows everything underneath. Her lips are painted the color of my eyes— and she flutters heavy lashes, thick with a type of glitter.

But somehow.

Somehow, the Beast in me doesn't show any reaction. When I'd faced Mistress earlier, I'd felt like I'd go insane trying to act like everything was fine. She had been wearing a dress that had gone down to the floor, covering everything.

"Are you going to let me in?" She says, her lips curving up into a smile. "You're old enough to know not to keep a lady waiting, hm?"

I step to the side.

And my eyes fix on her as she brushes past me, heading straight for the bed in the center of the room. She sets down the candle on the nightstand, before taking a seat on the edge and crossing her legs together. She runs a hand over the length of her thigh, purposely hitching the hem of her gown higher.

I close the door.

She laughs. "Look at you. You can't take your eyes off of me, can you?"

But my mind is full of Mistress.

If I please her.

If I please her and make her fall for me, will Mistress be happy? She'd told me not to let her touch me. But I knew what she wanted me to do. She had just been holding back for my sake, because she thought I couldn't handle it.

Because she still thinks of me as a child.

If I showed her that I could do it.

The woman laughs again as I move closer. She lets the gown slip from her shoulders, her eyes blatantly fixed on my body as she tucks a blonde curl over her ear.

Would she look at me any different?

"You are just so damn beautiful."

She grips the front of my shirt and pulls me down onto the bed. Hungry fingers soon unbutton it loose, and she climbs on top of me. Her legs straddling around my waist— the kisses on my throat and chest. It's everything that I expect.

I'd been through worse, with my past mistresses.

It had been just her, who had refused to touch me. When every single one of them had.

Only her.

My eyes close.

There were just so many things I didn't understand about my Mistress.



I'm worried.

I'd told him. Told him several times again after the first, just to make sure.

But what is this feeling that I can't brush away?

I jerk up to a sitting position. It's half past midnight. I'd been lying awake for an hour now, and the cup of lavender tea that Jimin had brought me before bed is already empty on the table.

Finally, the worry and the what ifs win.

I slip out of the blankets, with nothing but a nightdress as I make my way down to Taehyung's chambers. It's close to mine, and I get there even before my feet loses the warmth.

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