Crystalline °liskook°

01. Nice People.

And you may wonder..., Where did I fit here? A simple twenty years old girl who doesn't even go to college?

Well, we could say I was just a lucky bastard.

My mom was almost disinheriting me when I told her I would drop college. I think she already saw it coming, but that didn't stop her from opening her eyes like I was telling her I assaulted a bank. She didn't even wonder about my reasons, she just assumed I wanted to be a hippie hobo with no wishes of progressing in life, which was nothing true by the way!

Basically, she gave me an ultimatum.

"You can't leave university, Lisa. My God! You already have a year there! It's only three left and–"

"Ten, actually."

"—...and you'll be a professional with academic degree! Isn't that something amazing? Isn't that what I have told you to do your whole life? Studies are first, darling. You've already paid a lot! And you've also paid the next year... You're throwing money into the trash!"

"It's just money..."

Note, never say that to someone who grew up poor.

"Just money?!"

"Mom," I interrupted," I understand what you say but... it's my decision."

She looked at me with sorrow reflected in her face.

"Your decisions are wrong, Lisa."

Well, then... how supportive.

She denied once and again with her head. I let her. I didn't say anything. Because, just like I said, this was my decision and I wasn't going to give in no matter what she says.

Of course, I wasn't expecting she would kick me out.

"I don't approve of this. I won't let you do this, not in my house."

"What do you mean?"

Oh... Past me knew what she meant, you knew what she meant, everyone knew what she meant!

"That if you don't study as you always swore to me that you would, you, this house, will leave!"

My mother closing the doors of my house was something I definitely didn't expect. I wasn't including it in my plans, and it would destabilize everything for me.

I did know she wouldn't take it well, but... kick me out? From the house where I lived my whole eighteen years of life?

However, there was something characteristic in me, and that was my pride. I wouldn't lower my head and go back to my room moping, whining, and crying. I don't blame anyone whose reaction was that because I know the situation could be terrifying and many people wouldn't dare to such a risk as being homeless. Maybe just nodding and playing along would be the safest for anyone.

But no, there was no chance for me to give in.

Also... for every B plan, there was a C one, and for the C a D.

"Great! Enjoy paying the bills alone then."

"What?! But— Lisa!"

I was not thinking clearly, and this was not even close to the wisest decision I could take. Being completely alone in the world was never an option.

But then that's how I was in the United States. Alone.

I just couldn't linger on it anymore. Staying in my mother's house meant being someone who I was not, nor I wanted to be. It's not possible to live faking to grow in something when you know better than that. You know that's not you.