The show must go on Part II.

Chapter 4 - This time I went too far

I really enjoyed you all speculating, but the wait is over. This chapter has the answers  👀 So enjoy and as always please let me know what you think!

Jade POV

During our time in Auckland, I even stick to my own resolutions, mainly out of love to Perrie. But after our flight to Sydney and our first night there, my fingers are itching. I can't travel to a big city like Sydney without having explored the nightlife, without having been to the club, without having seen anything other than the arena and the inside of the hotel, can't leave without having experienced something.

So after the first show in Sydney, Leigh-Anne and I get ready in the arena, step out of the dressing room freshly dressed and meet two puzzled looks in the chill room.

"That's what took you so long," Jesy laughs, shaking her head. But Perrie doesn't feel like laughing, I can tell right away.

"I thought we were having a nice night at the hotel," she mutters, unable to hide her disappointment.

"Just like every night last week?" I remind her, smiling. "Come on, we're in Sydneys, babes," I hurriedly approach her, grabbing her hands and squeezing them tightly, trying in vain to make her smile with my own radiance. "I have to go out," I make her understand. "I don't have a choice!"

"Then have fun," she mutters, trying hard to lift the corners of her mouth, but I can see her disappointment, can't deny that it pains me to see her like this. But, if I'm honest with myself, I can't handle another night of just lying around the hotel, the ceiling is already falling on my head.

"There's always the option of you coming with me," I try, again.

"I'm pretty beat," is all she says and I know it's an excuse, I know she just doesn't want to go to a club. "See you tomorrow then," she whispers, probably thinking I'm not really responsive tonight.

She gives me a gentle kiss on the cheek before throwing her bag over her shoulder and heading out the door without a backward glance. I actually expect Jesy to run straight after her, but she doesn't. Instead, she looks at me.

"You're hurting her, you know that?" she whispers with a serious expression. I lower my head sorrowfully at first, realising how her words cut me deeply, even if they are not news.

"I'm hurting her by doing what I love," I explain sadly, but don't buckle, just watch as she shakes her head and leaves the room, leaving me to think about my words myself. It's not a lie, on the contrary: it hits the nail on the head and that makes it a problem.

Nevertheless, I try to switch off my thoughts, so I down a mini vodka on the way that I stole from the minibar in the hotel. Leigh looks at me from the side, being the only one in the car with me.

"I need this," I explain quietly, not even looking at her, unable to bear the next look of disappointment.

"You don't have to justify yourself to me," she surprises me though, making me turn my head towards her after all. What I see is not disappointment. It is compassion. And that almost makes it worse.