Chapter 10

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The accident took us a good four hours to clear. There was a standoff between the police and Crisis One and we were not allowed to assess any patients until it was resolved. Beckett decided to come back to the station to type up the reports and send a complaint to the union about SPD's unprofessional behavior.

I join Beckett in his office to divide and conquer the pile of paperwork waiting for us. I fill up both our cups with the leftover lukewarm coffee and make us each a plate, seeing how we haven't had the chance to eat. "So, don't get mad and give me a second before you jump down my throat." I shuffle the chair closer to his desk and hand him the business card. "You came up in my therapy session this morning and..."

He slams his fist against his desk, and I give him a pointed look to let me explain. "I did not tell her who you are or share anything you told me. I just mentioned going to an AA meeting with a friend." He calms down and nods at the card asking what it was. "She kindly pointed out that going to therapy doesn't qualify me to give out sound advice to someone who needs help."

I tell him about the psychiatrist's specialty, and he reacts exactly as I expected him to, but shocks me when he tells me he'll talk to Molly about it and stores the business card in his desk instead of throwing it away. He cleans his plate and look up at me like he just remembered something.

"I've been meaning to ask you all day, how did things go with Carina? Was she surprised? Did she love her present?" He rips off half the page he was writing on and hands me the other half of incidents I'll be reporting on.

"Oh, uhm. Yeah, it didn't go great. I think I need to take a minute and re-evaluate my approach to get her to talk to me." I summon my best fake smile but can't hide the disappointment of my failure from him. He looks at me with pity, and all I can think is that that look was one of the biggest reasons I don't let people in. I loathe being pitied, but I'm also in a lot of pain and I could use a friend to talk to.

Beckett has shown me so much trust the last few days. Maybe I can let him in and allow him to try and calm the demons running rampant in my brain, but before I can say anything, the alarm blares again.

AID CAR 19, ENGINE 19, LADDER 19
Residential Fire in Madison Park

The two of us run out of his office and get dressed in our turnouts and gear. We are met with Vic and Andy doing the same, hearing the footsteps of the rest of the team as they run towards us from various directions. "Let's head out 19!" Beckett bellows as we all jump on the trucks.

As we make our way through the streets, we can see the flames licking the sky as it fumes from the second and third floor of the mansion. "No initial report from dispatch. We're heading in blind on this one. Hughes, Bishop. Get on the primary search. I want updates on the structural integrity as you make your way through." I glance over at Vic and I give her a quick smile, happy to be paired with someone that didn't hate me.

Being actively involved in putting out a fire has been my grounding force for so long. As soon as my mask covers my face the only thing I focus on is the orange hue in front of me. My dad's voice is finally silent, the pain of Carina's drunken words and then moving out ceases immediately and the cover the mask provides allows me to drop the walls and focus solely on what lies ahead.

"Sullivan, Warren. Take the ladder up to the roof and see if it's safe to get the roof vented." Vic and I run into the front door as we see Andy and Theo run around to the back of the house. "The fire looks to be contained to the second and third floor, Cap. Structure looks good. We're heading up to the next floor now." Vic radios in our situation while I yell out for any victims to notify us of their location.

I do a quick sweep of all the rooms while Vic checks out the stairs to make sure it's stable enough for us to move to the next floor. "First floor is clear, Cap. No visible civilians, moving up." I grab onto Vic's turnouts as we enter the second floor. The flames are raging on the east side of the building and the smoke has made the staircase to the third floor almost invisible.

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