Home [Markhyuck]

45

Jeno's breath hitched.

"Everytime I think about it, I vomit. I did everything I could to try and make you happy. All I wanted was to see you start smiling again. I was so happy when I saw you smile because of Donghyuck...but I won't lie I did feel a little hurt. I'm your brother and I couldn't even make you crack a smile and some random guy comes home and your grinning from ear to ear. It wasn't fair."

Jeno titled his head back and closed his eyes.

"You've done so much for me," Jeno's voice cracked. "I just wanted to see you happy. To see you smile. For you to be proud of me because I'm always afraid that one day I'll wake up you'll be gone and...I'll be all alone. Left with the thought that maybe it was my fault-"

Jeno swallowed the thick lump in his throat and felt his eyes sting.

"Jeno..." Mark sighed as he felt the anger drain out of him and guilt fill up in his stomach. "Samoyed."

Jeno's lower lip wobbled when he finally decided to open his eyes and look at his brother.

"I didn't do what I did because of you," Mark sat down on the edge of the bed and took Jeno's uninjured hand in his own. "I did it...because at the time I wasn't doing well. I was in a toxic and self blaming mindset and I felt like I couldn't handle it anymore."

Jeno wrapped his fingers around Mark's hand, his fingers going towards the pulse in his wrist.

Mark was alive.

He was right here.

"I'm proud of you, man," Mark bent down a little to peer into Jeno's downcast eyes. "I've never been prouder. I may be older than you but I look up to you so much, Jen."

"Me?" Jeno whispered in disbelief.

"Yes, you," Mark let a soft smile fall on his lips as he reached a hand forward to pet his brothers hair. "You're amazing. You are the only person I would ever call perfect. I love you so much and I would hate myself if anything ever happened to you."

"I'm sorry," Jeno looked down at his broken arm. "I know what I did was stupid and-"

"No, I'm sorry," Mark squeezed Jeno's good hand. "I shouldn't have listened to Donghyuck. I should've went down there and stopped you."

"So he did get it," Jeno whispered out with raised brows.

"Huh?" Mark tilted his head at his brother's surprised expression.

"I...I told Donghyuck to give me at least 1 half to play," Jeno thought back to when Donghyuck's eyes locked on his hands.

He knew.

"I thought he would be the only one to understand," Jeno's lip quirked up as he played with Mark's now rigid fingers. "And he did. I owe that guy so much-"

"Wait. You told him to let you play," Mark's eyes were wide as he stared at his brother.

"Yeah," Jeno's voice dropped. "I feel bad for putting him through that I have to apolo-"

Jeno was cut off when the door opened.

Jaemin walked into the room without any emotion on his face. He was carrying a duffle bag from Jeno's room and a stuffed animal.

"Hi bun-" Jeno went to say.

"Don't," Jaemin glared as he threw the duffle bag down on the floor with a loud thud. "Here's a change of clothes and your charger and stuff. Taeyong and Jaehyun are on their way."

Jaemin took the stuffed animal and shoved it into Mark's arms.

"This is for when they examine his arm and realign it," Jaemin's voice was cold and it made Mark flinch a little.

Jaemin spun on his heels and back towards the door but stopped when Jeno spoke.

"Nana, where are you going?" Jeno frowned as he looked at his lover.

"I am going to go find more considerate people," Jaemin turned around with his arms across his chest. "To find people who don't do stupid shit and make their friends and boyfriend watch them get hurt."

"Nana-"

"I am also going to go find Donghyuck," Jaemin changed the direction of his glare. "The person who I thought was our friend. The one who's been put through so much only to have his heart ripped out and thrown on the floor by the one person who made him see the love of others."

"Jaemin-"

"No," Jaemin snapped. "Neither of you even fucking think about talking to me until you get your shit together. I hate to break it to you but there are things in this world that are bigger than yourself."

Jaemin slammed the door shut and the two brothers were left stunned.