Anna (Go To Him)

Chapter 15

John and I spent the next week or so slipping away to various secluded locales around our neighbourhood, walking, talking, and kissing. He assured me that he was going to talk to Ivan any day now, to tell him "man-to-man" that we were now an item, yet he never seemed to quite get around to it. I wasn't feeling in a rush, though; there was something incredibly exciting about having a secret romance. I felt like John and I were in our own little world, which only contained one another.

This made the return to school that much more difficult, especially since the art college students didn't start for another two weeks. I rode the bus to school morosely that first day, missing the chatter of John beside me. My head was in another place all day, causing Dot to corner me as the bell rang to signal the end of the lunch break. As Shelley and Patty hurried away, chatting conspiratorially – Shelley had regaled the three of us during lunch about her night with Pete – Dot linked an arm through mine as we made our way toward French class. "What's the news with you, then, Anna?"

"Huh?" I looked at her blankly.

She smirked, fixing me with a knowing look with those doe eyes of hers. "You've been away wi' the fairies all day! Somethin's up. Spill it."

I raised my eyebrows at her and swiftly averted my eyes, pressing my lips together and shrugging. Dot burst out laughing. "Cor, yer an awful liar!"

"Dot!"

"Come 'ead, Anna. Did something exciting happen at the party for you, too? I'm gutted I missed it – sounded like a real do!"

My fingers clenched my books tighter. I had kept strictly to John and my agreement not to share details of our new arrangement until we had a chance to clear it with my ex, in case Ivan found out through someone else. But this was Dot, who had proved her trustworthiness back when she'd caught John and I kissing for the first time, at the art college dance, months ago. She hadn't breathed a word about it to anyone in all this time. I could entrust her with this, couldn't I? Plus, I was bursting to tell someone.

I gripped Dot's forearm and leaned in close, as we paused outside our classroom door. "I've been seeing John, since the night of the party. We...had a bit of a fool-around that night and it's become a thing now, you see."

Dot leaned away from me, soft brown eyes wide and bow mouth dropped open in surprise. "But that's gear, Anna! Why the secrecy?"

"Well, Ivan doesn't know yet and John's his longtime mate, so...you know? John wants to tell him himself. We don't want him to find out through the grapevine, eh?"

Dot nodded. "I see." She paused for a moment. "Shelley doesn't know, eh?"

"Not a chance!"

She laughed. "A wise move. Well, yer secret is safe with me, Anna. In exchange for all the details, o' course..." She turned and headed into the classroom, leaving me hurrying to catch up with her, wondering where to begin.

***

A couple of weeks passed and still John hadn't got around to meeting with Ivan. The novelty of our secret love was starting to wear off and I was concerned that he was just too nervous to face him. Every time I had gently tried to bring it up, John would snap at me to get off his case. On one particularly contentious evening, after he'd tossed back quite a few bottles of beer in the bleachers of Calderstones Park, he accused me of still harbouring feelings for Ivan. "Why else would ye keep askin' about him?" He growled, shaking my hand off his arm as I'd been imploring him, again, to have the conversation.

"Because I want us to be able to come out of the shadows and stop hidin', ye stupid git!" I exploded. "I've been biting me tongue around all me friends, waiting for you to address the elephant in the room. It's the on'y thing standin' in the way of us bein' a real couple, John! I want to be with YOU, in front of everyone, and not have to worry about someone seein' us."