perfect sokeefe

chapter 80, lodestar

A/N: First two paragraphs are from Lodestar, Keepers of the Lost Cities by Shannon Messenger. 

♡⇐ Ｓｏｋｅｅｆｅ Ｌｏｖｅ ⇒♡

"So, quick question," he said as they picked their way through an especially dark hallway. "Is there a reason I keep getting this crazy gush every time I touch your hand?" Keefe realized how that sounded, and rephrased. "What I mean is, your emotions always feel strong. But now they're on another level.

"It's because I manifested as an Enhancer."—Keefe had always wondered if Forkle had given Foster another ability—"I'm supposed to wear gloves, but I took them off to help Edaline." 

Keefe knew she was expecting him to gloat, and as tempting as that sounded, there was something else he had to put an end to. Something in Sophie's emotional center gave him a blaring headache.

Something was hidden in the depths of her emotional center, radiating warmth he had never experienced as a child. It was overpowering, not in the way it normally was, but in a pleasant way, as if the emotion was about to circle him until he gave in. Keefe's heart urged him to succumb to the inviting emotion, but emotions could be misguided. 

Sophie had a crush on Fitz, not Keefe.

Putting that thought into words was difficult, but it was true, and that forced him to fight against the never-ending flow. 

He hoped she didn't see him flinch. "So that rush was an even clearer reading of your emotions?"

"Probably." Her voice was hesitant. "Why?"

"No reason." Keefe couldn't help but grin, hoping the dim light shadowed his lips.

Misfortune clashed with him when Sophie grabbed his wrist. "What is it? Why are you smiling?"

"I can't smile if I want to?"

There was a glint of relief in Sophie's eyes, and as if infectious, a smile graced Sophie's lips. It was beautiful on her, but as quickly as it had come, it was forced down. "You do know who you are, right? Because if Keefe Sencen is smiling, it can never mean something good."

No truer words had been spoken, but he stayed silent, hoping it would drive the wretched thoughts out of Sophie's head. Apparently, luck wasn't on his side when she asked, "Does it have something to do with my emotions?"

"It's nothing." Keefe muttered under his breath. It really wasn't.

Sophie focused. Her forehead wrinkled, and her grip tightened on his wrist. "You're lying!"

Stupid, he should've thought of that. He shook free.

"Yes." Keefe amended. "But it's nothing important. Really." He added when he saw the disbelief on her face. "It won't help us take down the Neverseen, or help us figure out what they're planning, or find the caches, or help us track down Alvar."

Sophie squirmed, before looking up with newfound confidence. "Okay. . . but it doesn't have to. I trust you. Why can't you do the same?"

There was a question he wished he could answer. Why couldn't he trust Sophie? She had done nothing but protect him, nothing but save him from his mother's clutches, and he only paid her back in betrayal. That single statement had wracked his nerves for the past week.

But he was scared. Keefe was scared that he would yearn for her protection, getting tangled in the web of her desires. And that would be dangerous for both him and her.

"Because it. . . changes things."

"That's good."

There was trust in her stare. Trust he didn't deserve. "Not in the way you're hoping. And definitely not with the Neverseen." He backed away. "Speaking of the Neverseen, don't you and Fitzy have work considering them? Why don't you go do that instead of wasting your time here with me?"

"Time spent with you is never wasted." Sophie took hold of Keefe's hand. Electricity shot up his spine. "And I mean that."

The words warmed Keefe's heart, and the love he felt doubled. It was confirmation for him, exposed confirmation for him to accept, but it was going to end badly, he could feel it.

"You're going to regret that," He found himself warning. "So, so badly."

"What?"—Sophie's voice was laced with confusion—"Regret what?"

Keefe stayed silent.

He felt her shake his hand. "Keefe, regret what?"

Keefe wished he could answer, but that would launch them into a whole puddle of awkwardness. And that was the last thing they needed when chasing down his mother.

So, instead, Keefe squeezed her hand, hoping it would calm her nerves before sprinting to the leapmaster. He hoped she wouldn't follow, but he saw her restrain herself from chasing after him.

Forced a smile, he waved, hoping his tone was as cheery as he hoped. "Focus on Fitz, Sophie! He's so much better than I'll ever be." 

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