human heart | neteyam

ten

S'MORE

"breathe in, breathe out," tsireyas voice was soothing as we all were gathered in a circle on a rock near the shore. i necessarily didn't understand why i was here because first, i couldn't breathe the pandora air anyway if i didn't have my oxygen mask on. second, i was human.

and i still full heartedly believed that i didn't belong here. i still allowed myself to participate, giving that everyone else was paying attention to tsireyas movements. "imagine the flicker of a flame," lo'ak was sat next to her and his eyes would glance at her often once he'd notice she wasn't paying attention to him.

"here, breathe from here," she put her hands on lo'aks chest. his eyes shot open as he felt her soft fingers press against him. which made kiri and i laugh, he was such a lover boy. tsireya snickered. "lo'ak, your heart beat is fast-"

neteyam burst into laughter and lo'ak glared over to him making sure he could feel the burn from his pupils. "sorry," lo'ak murmured.

"just try and breathe," her hands retracted from him.

"okay,"

kiri and i both rolled our eyes at their young behavior. i wasn't necessarily annoyed by it but i did find it a little exaggerated how lo'aks heartbeat grew with just the touch of her hands.

if only neteyam acted like that towards me. i mean let's be honest, if neteyam we're infatuated with me as much as tsireya and lo'ak were with each other, i'd pray to eywa and tell her how thankful i am.

but he would never be able to fully commit to me. no matter how many times he says he loves me, he forgets that we're two totally different species. and eventually he's going to want more than what he can have. i could give him all of me and it still wouldn't be enough to satisfy him. to satisfy his eternal needs, i don't even have the body parts for that. yes, we've kissed, but that's where we have to draw the line.

my body is unbelievably smaller than his, i mean, i don't even know if this is metaphorical because it surly could happen but i could probably die if we mated. that's why he needs a na'vi girl, a girl of the same species to give him what he wants. how could he ever become the next leader with a human for a wife?

he would be frowned upon, and i do not want that for him. i love him, i can feel his energy every time we're close, it's like a drug. a drug you can't get off of no matter how hard you try and stray away from it. i mean, even kissing him puts my life in danger. i can't breathe the pandora air for more than a minute before my lungs begin begging me to put my oxygen mask back on.

i sighed as i snapped myself out of my thoughts. i wish i could take my words back from when i confessed my love to him. so that he wouldn't of even had the hope that he could be with me. so that he could move on and find someone that's compatible with him. "you okay?" he placed his hand on my knee. another reason why we just wouldn't work, his hand was as big as my head.

let's be real, big hands aren't necessarily a bad thing but his we're another story.

i looked up at him, his beading yellow eyes burning into mine. this was his problem, he just had to be handsome, had to be good looking which only made this so much harder. "i'm okay,"  my lips curved into a small smile but i knew he could sense my off attitude.

"seems like the human feels left out," aonung teased. neteyam whipped his head to look at him. "watch it." he warned. if you could name the number one thing that would piss neteyam off the most, it would be disrespecting me.

neteyam, i believe would even kill someone just for looking at me the wrong way. i admired that about him but i also wished he would give me a chance to stand up for myself. "it's okay, it doesn't bother me," i backed him down. neteyam groaned at my words. "there's no way i'm just going to let this go-"

"neteyam." i warned. he fell silent. now he was mad at me, he hated when i would brush things off when in his eyes he saw the situation as a serious issue. he just stood up angrily before walking off; not daring to look back at the group.

i mentally face palmed. "let him cool off," tsireya coo'd, "and YOU," she pointed to aonung. "what he said, watch your mouth," aonung rolled his eyes at his sister before getting up and leaving too.

"this is why i hate boys," kiri snickered. "tell me about it," lo'ak agreed trying to bring himself into the conversation.

"to be honest i forgot you were even here," i joked, he playfully swatted my arm. it was just kiri, tsireya, lo'ak and i left. i sighed, now i was just hoping neteyam didn't go off somewhere and do something stupid.

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authors note

uh uh ohhh aonung... what else could go wrong? 🤭🤭

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