Redemancy

30.

Amara

I've been keeping my distance from the guys from time to time as much as I can, though it's a lot harder than I thought it be.

Distancing myself like that from them really makes me realise hoe touch and attention deprived I've been.

Literally, just need a good cuddle to be honest.

I'm sure they've noticed my being distant, but I'm sure they don't know the reason.

It's been a little less than a week since what happened, and I haven't been sleeping great in my own room.

I've had tendencies to go to theirs, but I don't want to give in, cause I am mad at them. One, for lying to me. Two, for shooting people right in front of me, or just shooting people in general.

Three, I'm furious with Valerius because he told me we'd talk but we still haven't, thought literally made a promise to me about that so it sucks that he broke it and lied, again.

And finally, if they truly did kill Patrick, I'm going to trash the house. Obviously, I don't mind Patrick being out of the way but, killing him? That's just literally my last straw out of four, and I usually only have one.

they've picked up on me talking to them less, and I don't think any of them knows why. Maybe Valerius does, but from what I know, he literally denies and ignores everything that doesn't go the way he wants it so, it doesn't really matter I guess.

school is a pretty good excuse to be honest. Though I am really bisy with it, I would ususally have time for them b ut now, I don't anymore.

It really disgusts me that they could do something like that. Seeing Seth shoot that man just like that, so easily without a doubt. And valerius too, though they bod somehow saved me doing it. But it makes me wonder if they've done it before.

"Hey Princess." Aeron mutters in a low and gruff manner as he makes his way into my room, causing me to drop my pen on my books before tilting my head up to look at him.

He looks so tired.

I smile at him, simply because that nickname hurts to much to hear. I can't, not while knowing they're are all lying to my faces, and that they have been for months now.

I look back at my textbook, trying to understand the quantum mechanics. I swear to god, physics is my worst subject ever.

I furrow my eyebrows while reading, feeling Aeron's eyes burn on me as I still feel his presence in my room.

I hear him sigh, before I hear him walking, sitting on my bed. I don't turn around, I simply try to focus on stupid physics.

"You know, we've never really shared someone. Not like this." He explains, letting out a sigh. "We've never let anyone in, only Xerxes. I don't know what you did to make us go soft, Amara. But you're doing a very good job doing so."

"It's strange how one person can have such a big effect on someone's life, let alone on six men's lives. It's strange, especially for us. You-you've made us want to change, Princess. You make us want to be better men, for you."

"Thanks to you, we finally feel what it's like to actually matter to someone." I hear him cough as he says so. "Turn around, baby. Look at me." I wait a few seconds, not wanting to give in. I turn around, as he told me to.

He looks awful. His beard unshaven, much more than usual. His hair is a mess and there are big dark circles under his eyes, bags, as if he hasn't slept for weeks. But what pierced through my heart most of all, is how sad and devastated he looks.