Numb - An Outsiders Fan Fic

chapter 13

Rylee decided that she was gonna start staying in my room after what happened and it's probably for the best.

I'm an idiot. A complete and total idiot. You see, my life has always been fucked up. My mom died when I was little, my father is a deadbeat alcoholic who could care less about his kids, he'd rather use us as a punching bag.

Mentally? I'll be honest, I've always been fucked in the head. Depression, anger issues, anxiety here and there. A touch of every thing. I'm fucked. And there's not much I can do about it.

I think the only time I've ever been happy was with my girlfriend Iris. Too bad she's dead.....too bad I killed her.

I was an idiot. Got a little drunk at a party, got behind the wheel with her in the passenger seat. I was driving fine to start with, then I decided it would be a brilliant idea to race the guy next to me at the stop light. 100 miles per hour and I lost control, slid off the road and slammed into a tree.

Next thing I know, I wake up and she's dead. I saw it with my own eyes.

She deserved a better life. A more peaceful death, a less messy one too. There was so much blood, I still can see it, it's etched in my brain permanently. She deserved someone a lot better than me, someone who wouldn't have done such an idiotic thing in the first place.

After that I got addicted to drugs. You could name any drug and I've probably gotten high off of it. It got so bad I nearly killed myself because I couldn't take the pain anymore, Slater and Nova were the ones to stop me. The pain in their eyes was the worst of it. They'd do anything to protect me, but they couldn't protect me from myself.

Slowly I got better, but now when shit hits the fan, I almost go back to it.

I don't want to hurt my siblings like that. They've been through enough, I can't pull shit like that.

"Okay shitface up and at em" Nova shouted as she walked into my room, snapping me out of my thoughts and scaring the shit out of

"Oh fuck off" I Flipped her off

"Yeah, not happening, come on were going outside because you've been spending too much time in this stinky room. Which by the way you stink too so your taking a shower before we go" she said as she lifted me off my bed with no struggle and set me in my wheelchair.

"Lovely, I'm being kidnapped and forced to be clean"

"Hey, no woman wants to date a man that smells like shit. It's not kidnapping when it's good for you." She said as she rolled me into the bathroom

"Who said I'm looking to date someone, maybe I want to scare women away. And it kinda is"

"Sure you do. Now take a shower you nasty" she said as she shut the door

"FUCK YOU!" I shouted and shook my head "Lovely" I mumbled to myself.

I hope you cried reading the majority of this chapter :D