AFFLICTION

75 ~ [This Can't Be Him!]

I might be stonehearted. I may have killed people in the most brutal and barbaric way but the single thought of Leera being hurt made me feel something I never felt in my entire life before. It was Fear. The word which never occurred to me once since my childhood. Fear of losing her. Fear of losing myself again.

I'm not grieving Antonio's death cause he never meant much in my life to grieve for. I have to find out why did he do so as there isn't any possibility of him risking his life just to save mine. There must be something that I can't see even though its infront of me. I'm disappointed at my capabilities. I'm disappointed at myself. How could I miss out such a thing? I wasn't using that car for a few days but when the engine of that car was started, at the same time the bomb started ticking too. I'm not afraid of death but what if Leera was in that car with me? What if It was really her who was driving the car? I can't even bear the thought of something happening to her.

"Boss, this came for you." Remor hands me an envelope. I took a puff of cigarette and opened the envelope knowing what it might be and then I saw it's what I guessed it to be.

A message from the weakling mastermind behind all these,

Mother gone. Father gone.
Everyone is in danger prone.
How long will you be sitting on the throne
When you will be left all alone?

I cackled with laughter. This dick even got courage to send me threats about killing my other family members in poem form? Fucking coward who can only attack from back.

"Any information?" I arch an eyebrow at Remor. "The bomb was set by our own man and he escaped as soon as possible after. We found that he's in Texas by tracing. We have our eyes on him. Hopefully we will get to our target by following him" He apprises me.

Our every soldier and man has a tracker that we set inside their body without their own acknowledgement right after their enrollment.

I slightly nodded and burned the letter with my zippo lighter, watching the page flame with fire and turn into ashes as it touches the floor. My feet compressed the burned pages and the threats were just dust under my feet. And his condition will be the same soon.

* * * * * *

It was late when I returned home, finding her in bed without me for the first time. She always waits for me until I come home even if I tell her not to. I couldn't talk to her properly since yesterday after our fight. At first the hospital then the funeral. And then I disappeared for the whole day.

I squatted down infront of her to see her face properly. Her hair strands were obstructing me to have the perfect view of her face. So I pushed the strands back gently with my fingertips and smiled as my eyes contemplated her dream alike exhausted face.

I didn't tell her that it was my car and the bomb was planted for me actually. I don't want to scare her. She's already petrified a lot. And I don't need her to be worrying for me everytime I leave the apartment. All I need to make sure is she is safe and sound.

"non posso vivere senza di te. non posso perderti Ti amo tanto." I lightly caressed her face with the back of my hand.

(I can't live without you. I can't lose you. I love you so much.)

After taking a shower I lay beside her holding her close to me and making sure I don't wake her up but this closeness doesn't feel close enough. I held her closer letting her lavender scent confine me somewhere in her and kissing her hair one last time it didn't take me long to drowse.