Shades of Limelight

13: Karma

At this point in my life, I didn't have much to lose personally by taking the tiny little risk of airing out some dirty laundry that really wasn't anyone's business.

I had already forgone an unpaid internship that could put my career on the right track because my family needed money, I had made a fool of myself by not just saying yes to Corey in front of thousands of people, and now, I was throwing away the journalistic integrity in which I had taken pride for my years at the University of Wisconsin. It was all for a variety of good reasons, of course, but it wasn't like everyone would know or understand those reasons.

The only people who knew that our newspaper was struggling were Isabel, Dr. Lambert, and me (along with anyone who actually put half a second of thought into it), but with a few words, I could get us back on the right track. With a few words, I could finally tell my side of the story. Then it would truly be in the hands of the people to use that information and decide who and what was really right.

In a way, I was really doing the right thing, not only for me, but for all Badgers.

Well, except for Corey, but that was a necessary casualty.

I sat in front of my laptop, unsure of how I wanted to start setting the record straight. There was a lot of responsibility that came with that, but at least I had a little bit of education and training in dealing with the media, unlike some others.

Well, Layla, if that was a shot at Corey, that's simply not true. He had been dealing with the media since high school.

I took in a breath. No matter how upset I was, I did have to stick to the truth of what really happened and what I was really going through.

Even though I figured that the words would start pouring out of me once I sat down and started writing my thoughts, no words found their way from my keyboard to the screen. There wasn't a single thought in my mind about where I needed to start my story.

Maybe starting with my feelings would get the brainstorming process going.

I am mad. I paused for a moment. That really wasn't good enough of a start. I am pissed off that I'm this sad about Corey.

That was a little better, but it still didn't even begin to cover what truly happened that evening.

But before I could continue trying to write my revenge, a familiar voice spoke out from behind me.

"You busy?" Ryan asked.

I slumped back in my chair in defeat. "Not yet, at least." I paused for a moment. "I'm really sorry about lashing out on you last night. Obviously I was a little bit more upset than I wanted to be about that whole thing."

"Don't worry about it. We've all been there." Ryan hesitated. "Well, everyone has not been in quite the same situation, but no one is a stranger to getting their heart broken. It sucks."

I put on a small smile. "It really does."

"So did you find a story worth pursuing?" Ryan asked as he gestured towards my laptop.

I shrugged. "I don't know. I thought maybe I should write out my side of the story, and if that's any good, I'll give it to Isabel so she can do what she wants with it."

"I thought you just wanted this story to die already."

"I do, but I also think it's important to make sure everyone knows the facts so they can form an educated opinion."

"About a story that won't matter in a year?"

I nodded. "For them, yes, but it's still going to matter to me in a year."