Oh. My. Fate?! (BL, Volume 11, Part 1)

113 Some Matters to Ponder

At the same time, over in the Nine Heavens, Jing He had gone to bed. He wasn't asleep though. No, right now, he was unable to sleep. There was too much going through his mind.

It really wasn't surprising. Returning from one's trial — especially the first one — was always a thought-provoking experience. Living in a state of not knowing at first and then remembering the sensation of death as if it was the end of your true immortal identity ... that alone could give many trueborn gods pause.

In a way, Jing He was different from them. Dying was something that he didn't worry too much about. His childhood hadn't been peaceful. For every day of those two thousand years that it took a god to reach the day they came of age, he had been well aware that it might be his last. Too high was the possibility of Tian's curse on his family striking him down as that he dared to have any hope.

So death, to him, was something he had gotten close to often enough to not be afraid when it finally happened. In fact, when he felt the unwillingness of his mortal self to leave the world behind, he had felt some surprise. Was it normal to cling to life that much?

But come to think of it, all of it made sense now that Qiu Ling had explained some matters regarding his trial to him. His mortal self had just gotten married to the man he loved. Of course, he wouldn't want to leave. If it was him ...

Jing He turned onto his side, pulling the blanket higher. He hardly dared to think about it but yes, if it was him, he also couldn't bear to leave. He had waited for so long to be with Qiu Ling. Even now, he still had to be patient before they could hold a wedding ceremony and he could truly become his. At that time, how could he not be reluctant to go if life suddenly came to an end?

Qiu Ling's explanation had shed light on this matter. It had also managed to take some worry from him. After all, seeing the man he loved as his immortal self in the final moments of his mortal life had confused him and so had Qiu Ling's absence from the Nine Heavens in the following week. Now, he didn't need to worry about either of these matters any longer.

At the same time, Qiu Ling's explanation had shown him just how much had changed in the time he was away though. To be honest, this made him feel somewhat uncomfortable. Originally, it should have only been two or maybe three months. Now, several years seemed to have gone by. Even if it hadn't changed the relationship between him and Qiu Ling, the world he knew wouldn't be exactly the same any longer. Weren't Qiu Ling's confessions today proof of that?

Jing He sighed and turned onto his back again, staring up into the darkness. All these things Qiu Ling had told him, he didn't even know what to think about first. He was worried about meeting the supreme ruler but that was something he couldn't solve by thinking about it. Since nobody but the two of them knew — not even Qiu Ling — he could only wait until that memory returned. On the other hand, there were Qiu Ling's private matters. This was what made him anxious the most.

Qiu Ling's family had never been an issue but now, he was suddenly confronted with the possibility of meeting them. The worst was that because of how their reunion had come about, there might be some preconceived notions. After all, they had likely met his mortal self, hadn't they?

Jing He reached up and covered his lips. His mortal self ... In that form, he had managed to get married to Qiu Ling. Of course, a lot more time had passed in that life compared to the decade they had known each other between when they first met in the Nine Heavens and when he went on his trial. Maybe their getting married didn't mean much. But then, he had been a mortal from some mortal kingdom he didn't know the name of yet.

Surely, their customs would differ from the Nine Heavens and the view they held on marriage, relationships, and modesty should be different as well. It was possible that he had done things in that life he never would as a trueborn god. Qiu Ling would have witnessed such behavior first hand and maybe even his family had seen it. In that case, did they believe his trueborn god self was the same?

Jing He closed his eyes and sighed. He couldn't change the past so the thought made him nervous. But then, in the future, he could still work hard to put his best foot forward so Qiu Ling's family would gain a better impression of him no matter what had been in the past.

Yes, not all was lost yet. As long as he put in more effort, he would be able to impress them. The most important was to plan ahead. He couldn't leave any of this up to fate. From his appearance to his demeanor to the words he said, no fault was allowed to be found. Only then did he have a chance to make them believe that he was the right one for Qiu Ling.

He turned to the other side, glancing toward the dressing table. To meet the previous dragon king and the father of the current king ... what did one wear? He had a faint notion of what would be right from the viewpoint of his people but these two were dragons. With their age, there was even a chance they were more traditional. Considering that he was supposed to marry into the dragon realm, maybe this required the advice of a dragon instead so he could make his attitude clear.