I'm in Alice in borderland???//various x reader

Chapter 4: Run, Usagi, Run!!

 Note: you will be replacing Arisu for the first part of episode 4 where he's first teams up with usagi.

Y/n's POV

The next day, i was laying on the ground, feeling guilty as ever for sacrificing those kids. *All that, and for what?* I said, feeling weak for what i did. *I'm so weak, that i had to sacrifice a group of high schoolers for a stupid card* I thought, mentally beating myself up over it. All of a sudden I felt someone use their foot as if trying to make sure i was still alive. That's when i heard Usagi softly say "you wanna live?", but i didn't respond. i felt her get down, and that's when i whispered "i just..I wanna die here" , i said it so softly and so quietly, that i'm not even sure she heard me. "yeah..I get it" she softly said, before getting up. She began walking away, leaving me to dwell in my guilt.

Arisu's POV

"where's y/n? They've been gone for a long time." Chota suddenly said. That's when i really thought about it. Y/n has been gone for a while. "Actually, now that you mention it, they haven't come back yet, have they? shibuki said. "Maybe they're still hunting for food?" Karube asked. "doubt it, hunting shouldn't take this long." Shibuki said. "Maybe we should go look for them?" I said. I'm worried about them, they've been gone for a while.  The others agreed, and there we set off to look for y/n.

Y/n's POV

it was the next day, and i was still in the same spot as yesterday, the only difference is that i was sleeping and it was raining. I was laying on the cold ground getting soaked by the rain. 

I woke up, and i saw that i wasn't in the rain anymore, i wasn't even outside. Instead i was inside what looked to be a warehouse of sorts. I then looked to the side, and saw usagi already looking at me. She then placed a small bowl of food, and a cup of water in front of me. I stared at the food, then at her, and then back to the food, not really knowing what to do. She sat down, said a quick thank you, and began eating. I just stared at her. "why did you save me?" I asked. She took a few seconds before saying " your body says it wants to live." "my body...might say it wants to live, but i don't deserve to live anymore" i said, gloomingly. "they're all dead..and i'm the only one still alive. they all had to die, so i could survive." I said, a tear running down my face. "I might as well be the one who killed them all." I said, crying. I may not have known the kids at all, but that doesn't make me feel better. It makes me feel worse, actually. Those kids had their whole lives ahead of them, and i went and ended them, just to survive. No matter how much i say sorry, i just can't seem to forgive myself. "i killed them all. I don't deserve to live, not after i let them all die. i have to die. i have to die. I have to die! i have to die so they can forgive me. I need to die! I need to make it up to all of them! I need to make amends for everything i've done!" I said, crying. Usagi stay quiet. after a few seconds of silence, Usagi started to tell me what she went through. she then said some comforting words, and told me to eat. i did what she said, and went back to sleep. 

The next day, i was woken up, by usagi walking in with the others. They all immediately ran towards me, and gave me a hug, but i didn't react. they were all saying things like "i'm so glad you're okay" "what happened to you?" "where were you???" and "i was so worried!"

Usagi then interrupted the moment and said "i found them wandering the streets. they said they were looking for you." she then told them to get ready, before turning to me and saying the same thing, but added "you wanna die by your visa expiring?" i didn't reply. she then brought the tag game, saying how i risked my life trying to save everyone. The others looked at me. "i didn't want to die then" i said. it was silent before i said, "i didn't want anyone else to either."