Gingerbread Latte

Chapter 8 - Just strangle her already

"I want so badly to protect you from the world because I know all too well how bad it can be."

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Valerie's POV

I've been awake for more than half an hour. But I haven't moved a muscle yet. Not that I am able to.

Why, you might ask. Well, because Mr. I-am-atheletic-and-I-have-muscles had my flesh and bones wrapped up between his strong arms. Our bodies were tangled up in ways I am unable to break free of. He was so heavy and I can't move away without him waking up first. I shot him a glare even though he was fast asleep.

How did we end up cuddling through the night, goddammit? I have no clue. I wanted to scold myself, to slap myself awake. I have been making so many reckless decisions lately and I need to get back in line.

This is not acceptable.

My gaze flickered all over his face and I gulped down. He is not acceptable. I can't let myself fall for his games and charm. I will be the one paying the price, and I have paid enough. I won't handle more.

The thing is, I just didn't want to go back home last night, not when I saw that my mother was there. We were only going to fight. I was in a good mood after so long and I selfishly didn't want her to ruin it like she always does. Was it crazy that I preferred the days when she slept out and didn't come home? Being a flight attendant gave her a hectic schedule and I think she preferred it that way too. She likes staying out, rather than coming back home to us.

It's been like that since dad passed away. She barely spent any time at home, and even when she did, she would just lock herself in her room. Isolated. From us and just everyone.

God, I can't remember the last time we even had a decent conversation, or the last time she asked me about school, or if I needed anything because god knows I needed so many things. We speak to each other only to fight, only for her to blame me, and only to decide who is taking Reneé to her next doctor's appointment. That's all.

I shook the series of heavy bad thoughts away and focused on the moment, on how in hell will I untangle myself free from this giant human. I shot him another glare, his face beckoning me to inch closer and slap him, because it wasn't possible for someone to look hot even while sleeping. His hair was as perfect as ever, a hot mess on the top of his head, in the same way he wears it almost every day. His eyes were resting, so peaceful, like a little baby wrapped up in his favorite blanket.

My eyes flickered down, falling into his lips and my mind took me back to last night, to the party, to how I was about to commit yet another mistake. I can indulge in his games as much as he wants, but attempting anything physical would be too much for me to take. I ain't signing my soul to the devil again.

"Max," I whispered, attempting to wake him up.

He didn't even twitch. Jesus Christ.

"Max!" I whisper-yelled, scared that his parents or anyone else would open that door and catch us in such a position.

"Hmmfrhg," He mumbled sleepily in gibberish and I smiled, a very small one because he was adorable at times.

"Max, wake up," I whispered again, trying to pull away from him, only to have him pull me much closer, sleepily edging his head forward toward mine. My eyes widened at how close his face was getting, his forehead resting against my own, one breath separating us and he would have his lips press onto mine.

I panicked at the foreseen future so I...slapped him.

The force shook him awake for real now. His eyes snapped open, jerked away from his dreams and lines etched his forehead as he stared back at me, dumbfounded. He rubbed his hand over his cheek, "Did you just..." He started to say, his voice gruff with his sleepiness, "Did you just slap me?"