little bundle of joy | taekook

One

Taehyung's pov:

I waved to Hoseok from his car as I made my way to my front door.

My head was pounding because I haven't been able to slip all day, my professors have been setting endless amounts of essays and homework to do class after class.

My plan was to go upstairs and lock myself in my room so I could become little. However, I was welcomed with the piercing screams and cries of my 1 year old brother Haru.

My head shot up to the where the sound was coming from. Haru was strapped in his high chair hysterically crying. Hot tears streamed down his red puffy face and he looked terrified. My eyes fell to the living room where my father laid. He was passed out on the sofa, half empty whiskey bottle held loosely between his fingers.

I dropped everything I was carrying and ran over to my brother. As soon as he saw me, his tiny hands shot up, making grabby hands.

"my poor baby" I whispered, unlocking him from his high chair and pulling him into my arms. He instantly grabbed ahold of my jumper and cried louder.

"shh shhh it's okay, you're alright, i've got you" I reassured, gently rocking him side to side, eyes still locked with my fathers body.

I looked around for something to calm Haru down. I spotted his pacifier on the table. My breath hitched as I picked it up. My mind instantly going fuzzy.

not now.

I shook myself out of it and placed the paci between his trembling lips.

Haru took it and instantly relaxed. Soon only his sniffles were heard throughout the kitchen.

I sighed when I felt a heavy diaper under his fingers. He needs a change.

I hoisted Haru's tiny body up onto my hip and began walking upstairs, laying him down on his changing table.

I undressed him and wiped him clean, before turning to pick up a clean diaper.

I felt the soft elastic material between my fingers, my mind going fuzzy once again.

I closed my eyes and steadied myself against the wall.

no.

snap out of it.

I did some quick maths equations in my head until the feeling was gone before turning back to my brother.

I quickly changed Haru and brought him back downstairs. Knowing my dad probably strapped him in his highchair and drank until he passed out before even feeding him.

"do you want a bottle?" I asked him even though I desperately wanted one myself.

Haru nodded happily and clapped his hands excitedly, making me coo.

"okay come on" I bounced him a few times making him squeal in delight before I filled his bottle up with milk and heated it up.

Just as it was done, I heard my dad groan.

Probably hungover.

I know my dad is a good man. He was the best father in the world. I use to be very close to him. However, my mum walked out when Haru was born just over a year ago and everything has gone to shit since. My dad struggled a lot after her leave. He was suddenly left to look after a 15 year old and a new born at the time. His work hours increased as did his stress. He tries the best he can but alcohol soon became a great escape for him. I feel bad for him. I really do. But I can't be left to look after Haru. Not when i'm a little. It's too difficult. I'm scared i'll one day slip when he's in my care. Everything about Haru triggers the little inside of me and it hurts to prevent myself from giving in. When i'm little my natural age is around 1-2 years old. The oldest i've ever been is 3 so i'm practically defenceless when I slip. However a year has gone by and i'm getting pretty good at controlling myself.