If Ever | Damiano David Story

Chapter 11 | Even more than the other nights

22 May 2021

Another thing I love about Eurovision is the lovely and fun weirdness, so normally, the band singing for Lithuania stole my heart immediately. The song is good and so catchy, although it does sound very familiar, but I can't recall what it reminds me of and it's driving me crazy.

"That part before the verse sounds so familiar, right?"

"So, we have heard Lady Gaga, Ariana Grande, Linking Park and now another familiar song? Is this the -you've lived it before- Eurovision?" Marsia is just searching for a reason to whine at this point. Why can't she admit the fact that she's enjoying watching it? Sure, it might not be the best music you'll ever hear but it's fun and some songs are actually good.

I look at her a little annoyed by her attitude. I grab the bottle of wine and pass it to her. "Here. Drink some more."

"There are more polite ways to tell me to shut up."

"No, there's not."

I know that her bad mood has nothing to do with me or the fact that I "made" her watch Eurovision. She is annoyed because Stefanos is out with someone else even though she won't admit it. I can understand that. She has feelings for him but she's afraid to admit it to herself because once you admit it there's not turning back. Once you admit it, it becomes your reality and then you'd have to deal with your feelings and either do something about them or forget everything and move on. It sucks in other words. Having feelings for someone sucks and there's no way anyone can change my mind. I was doing fine until I actually fall in for the first time with Haris. Before that I just didn't connect with people, I used to walk away before I even got to feel something deeper. It was easier that way. For me at least. And now, everything seems harder.

25 August 2020

It was the last night we would stay in the island, we were leaving tomorrow morning and I was sitting alone on the beach taking it all in one last time. I couldn't believe how fast the days passed and I was not ready to leave yet. I was having so much fun and going back to reality would be hard. Before, we'd gotten there I made a promise that I'd show myself that I was ready to move on from my break-up and I succeed incredibly well. My relationship with Haris had ended way before it actually ended. For quite some time there was no spark between us, but we cared about each other to much and no one was willing to admit it. Breaking up was of course hard and sometimes I felt like I couldn't handle it, but for quite some time I'd been wanting to find that passion and sparkle again in my life and kind of hoped I'd find it here. And I guess I met the right person to help with that. An incredible person that sadly I would never have the chance to see again. With Damiano I felt the passion I was missing for a long time, and he turned out to be an awesome guy too. If I was being honest to myself, it felt sad that I had to say goodbye.

Someone came and sat next to me. I didn't have to turn to know who it was. I took a deep breathe and closed my eyes trying to enjoy these last moments. Eventually, I opened my eyes and turned to look at him. He was handsome as always. He was looking at me with no emotions showing. I'd like to know what he was thinking about.

"I had a very good time." I smiled at him. "And you played a big part on that."

He was still looking at me emotionless. "I don't know what I'm supposed to say now."

I gave a half smile at him. "Nothing, let's just leave it to that. We had fun."

"We did."

"And If I'm ever in Rome. I'll call you." I winked at him copying what he did last night and then I laughed a little. "But that will probably not happen."

He was still looking at me emotionless. Not a smile, not even a smirk. Nothing. That was weird and was giving me chills. Eventually, he stood up and gave me his hand.

"Come on. Get up."

"Why?" I asked confused.

"Because you can't spend all night here. Everyone else are hanging out and you shouldn't stay here alone."

I took his hand and got up. When I stood up, we were inches apart from each other. He was looking at me in the eyes with the same look and we stayed there for some seconds. I started to get freaked out by that look on his face. Not a sight of emotion. How did he do that?

"You look beautiful tonight. Even more than the other nights. I don't understand how's that possible."

I smiled at his words. He leaned and kissed me gently on my lips but then pulled away. "Come on. They send me to get you to them and If we stay here a little more, I'm afraid I won't."

We spent the rest of the night all together hanging out. It was only some days that we spent together but it felt like we knew each other more. I ended up liking them all very much and I was bummed that he had to leave and I'd never get to hang out with them again. Although, after Damiano showed me his Instagram and they didn't have to avoid talking about their success and career anymore, we all exchanged social medias I don't think that's enough to stay in contact no matter how much I liked them. We had to say our goodbyes then too because we were leaving early in the morning. We'd probably not see them. We had packed everything except the one tent. Ethan suggested we stay in their tent so that we have one less to unset in the morning. It was thoughtful of him, but I wasn't crazy about the idea since my last night on the island the tent would be occupied. I could see in Damiano's eyes that he wasn't either. The time passed and we had to sleep. I was saying goodbye to Victoria.

She was hugging me and I hugged her back. "We can maybe talk on Instagram."

"Maybe." I said smiling although I knew that would not happen. "It was really nice meeting you."

"Yeah, you too." She frowned at me and the went to say goodbye to Marsia.

I have said goodbye to everyone. Well, almost, everyone. The last one remaining would be the hardest one, although I kind of have already said it.

Damiano came behind me, leaned on my head. Oh, how much I'd miss that feeling. That burn I felt whenever he was closer to me, that excitement every time he was looking at me. "Come with me." He whispered in my ear.

He started walking away from the tents and I followed him. "Where are we going?"

He didn't answer me. He kept walking until he reached their car then he turned my way, he grabbed me gently and pressed me against the car kissing me. I was right, this one would be the hardest one. Knowing that I would never experience that feeling again, that I would never get to kiss him again. Maybe it was better that way.

"You are beautiful." He whispered while our foreheads were touching and that's all I needed to have the perfect ending to my vacations.