"I deserve to know." He said as I squinted at him. "You deserve nothing." I said as he chuckled.
"I feel bad, alright? I made a mistake and want to make things right." Colby said as I sighed.
"There's nothing else to really say." I said with a shrug.
"Tell me everything." He said and came to sit on the couch with me. "What do you mean by everything?" I asked and hugged my knees.
"From the day I left until now." He said as I squinted.
"Why?" I asked as he sighed. "Because, Julia. You were sobbing last night telling me I ruined your life, I would like to know more of what I did." He said with a serious tone.
"Well. When you left I fell apart but thanks to Sam and the girls I was able to get my new life started." I explained, picking at my fingers.
"I took the kids to Spokane and we got a house. That was the only thing I used your money for...well that and drugs." I said, remembering how dark things got.
"I would put the kids to bed and take as many pills as I could, letting the high occupy my mind before the sadness could." I explained, not looking at Colby.
I knew if I looked at him, I would fall apart.
"I was on a bender for three months before I found out I was pregnant." I said quietly. "I was four months pregnant with a baby boy." I whispered, my voice cracking.
"I immediately stopped taking the pills and tried to get myself together. It wasn't enough though." I said and closed my eyes.
"Hey.." Colby said and reached over, putting his hand on my knee. "Don't." I whispered, flinching away from him.
"Since I had the kids, I had to get over it and move on. I couldn't let them see me like that." I said and finally looked up at him.
There was a somber look on his face, but he was paying close attention to me and what I was saying.
"I got my shit together and started going to school. I got a stable job and I just became a mom." I said and looked down.
"Everything I did was for my siblings." I said with a sigh. "Everything." I mumbled, feeling my heart ache.
"And how did you meet Adam?" He asked as I sighed. "I got pulled over. I woke up late and was speeding trying to get the kids to school." I said, breathing a laugh at the memory.
"I didn't have my ID on me so I had to bring it to the station." I said then remember something.
"Wait." I said and looked up at him. "What's wrong?" He asked with confusion.
"When I went home, I couldn't find my wallet. I remembered leaving it on the dresser but it wasn't there. It was under my bed." I said as he nodded.
"He knew about you before you knew about him." Colby said as a chill ran down my spine.
"Ew." I said and hugged myself. "So you went to the police station and gave him your ID?" He asked as I nodded.
"Yeah. I got his number and we started seeing eachother. He was nice and the kids really liked him." I said with a sigh.
"Then the kids were gone and he got mean and well..." I said, feeling my heart start to race.
"And what?" Colby asked as I shook my head. "He got abusive." I mumbled causing him to clench his jaw.
"He would force me to do things. I didn't have a choice..he was just so much stronger." I said as Colby stood up, pacing the room.
The sudden action caused me to flinch.
"What are you doing?" I asked as he clenched his fist, pacing back and forth.
"I want to fucking kill him." He said, not looking at me.
"I didn't sleep with anyone else but you...and I guess now him, ya know." I said quietly causing him to look up at me.
"Really?" He asked as I nodded. "The kiss you saw in the club between Adam and I was the first kiss I had since you." I admitted as he closed his eyes.
"I'm sorry for calling you a whore." He said as I nodded. "Yeah and I'm not sorry for calling you a whore. Are we done with the interrogation now?" I asked and grabbed the coloring book again.
I didn't want to open up to Colby anymore. I had said enough and didn't want another reason for him to be able to hurt me.
"It's not an interrogation. I just needed some information. I don't know what this guys motive really is." Colby said as I nodded.
"It's to get to me so you'll be distracted. You don't love me anymore so it should be fairly simple to not show it." I said, absentmindedly coloring in my book.
"Right." Colby said then opened the pizza box. "You didn't eat anything?" He asked as I shook my head.
"Not hungry." I said with a shrug. "You've gotta eat, Julia. I don't really care if you're hungry or not." He said and slid the box closer to me after taking a slice.
I huffed out a breath then leaned forward and grabbed a slice, not wanting to argue.
"One more question then I'm done. You mentioned that there were guys coming up to you a lot. Do you remember what any of them looked like?" Colby asked.
"Jealous?" I asked as he scoffed. "You're so annoying sometimes. No, I think they were from Adam's gang. I need to find them before they find you." He explained with a sigh.
"They looked like basic white guys. I don't know what to tell you." I said as he nodded. "Alright. If you need me I'll be on the balcony." He said then turned and went outside.
I felt a little weird after telling Colby everything. It was also a little therapeutic, but I didn't want to talk about it anymore.
The past hurt me and I didn't want him to hurt me more with that information.
He probably wouldn't do that, but as far as I was concerned I could hardly trust him with anything.
Especially my heart.
