𝙰𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚡𝚒𝚊 (stray kids x male reader)

Chapter 17

Y/n's pov

I'm okay with people. I don't like them, in fact if i didn't have to talk to anyone ever again, I wouldn't. But I'm horrible with family. Every timeI meet someone's family I feel all clammy and gross. I feel judged.

I think its because I dont have a family for people to meet. It's just me and Tae. Anyone meeting Tae is a huge deal, but many people meet him at some point.

"Angel, it's just dinner with my family. I'm sure they will love you" Hyunjin tells me, wrapping his arms around my waist.

I can't explain how much I do not want to go. I love my soulmates and I would do anything for them, but I also know that I say all the wrong things at the wrong moment. I am not a people person.

I groan and try to pull away from him. This isn't fair . He sprang this on me 2 hours ago and now I suddenly have to do this. I don't want to, but I know I have to. I love hyunjin, and his family comes along with him. I'll have to this 8 fucking times. 8 times.

"Maybe I should just stay home? I mean- this is the first time you have seen them in awhile. You should catch up with them alone." Im rambling because thats all I can do to keep myself from freaking out. Hyunjins family is nice. They have to be, I mean look at Hyunjin. Whoever raised him have to be saints.

Hyunjin smiles and pulls me closer. He kisses my cheek and mutters some words of encouragement. "Y/n I know this is scary, but they will love you. I've told them all about you. My family is so excited to meet you, I promise they will adore you." His voice is calm. Soothing. It helps calm me lightly but not enough.

I nod and look at the others. They all are dressed and ready. We are supposed to me hyunjin's family at a restaurant in 30 minutes so we need to leave right about now. I don't want to, but I know I should.

I don't want hyunjin to feel like this isn't important to me. It is. Anything he has or does is important to me. That's why I'm freaking out here.

My soulmates are my reason to live or die. In the short time I've known all of them they have become my reason to breathe, if I'm in the same room as them they are all I can look at. Being with them is like I can finally breathe after thousands of years underwater.

The mere thought of such a big part of them not liking me terrifies me. I'll do anything for them to love me, therefore I have to be on my best behavior. All manners, no sarcasm and keeping my hands to myself.

I feel Seungmin grab my hand and I smile. My face lights up whenever any of them even remotely look at me. All of the guys took habit of pointing it out, now they just smile back.

I look at Seungmin and he leans down to my ear "You'll do great. They will love you." He whispers to me. He then kisses my cheek and sqeezes my hand. I've got this. I can do this.

—-

We get to the restaurant and all I want to do it run away and cry. This is big, huge. This is such a big moment and I'm so terrified that I'll mess it up. I cant mess it up. Hyunjin looks relaxed but I can see how nervous he is.

He hides how he feels for the benefit of others. We are similar in that way.

All the guys are looking at me. I'm not looking at them but I can feel it. They refuse to admit it, but they think I'll break one day. Just be fine one second, then the next have some mental breakdown.

They are probably right. But I'll never admit it. I need to fix what I've done before I can fully show them me. That sounds wrong. I know it is. But I want them to trust me. They don't want me to run and I definitely don't want to run. I'm prone to running but I want them. Always.