Skirts and flirts (COMPLETED)

XLIV

''Lou Lou!'' Phoebe and Daisy yelled, burying themselves in their brother's arms.

''Hi, guys. What are you doing here?'' Louis asked shocked.

''Just came to visit.'' Jay shrugged.

No, no they never came to visit. At least, unannounced. Never, ever, ever. Something was terribly wrong. Something happened to them or maybe someone did something to them.

What was going on?

''Oh, well, I am glad. Hey, do you wanna see my new bed? You can jump on it, if you want.'' Louis said, Daisy and Phoebe, who screamed and run to his room. Louis smiled, his face turned, as he watched his little sisters disappearing.

''Why are you here, mum?'' Louis sighed.

''Aren't you happy to see us?'' she asked, cocking her head to the side.

''I am, mum, I am, but I haven't seen you in months! You told me not to visit you during Christmas! I was stuck here all by myself and I don't even know why and here you are now, standing in front of me perfectly fine with no warning.'' Louis whisper-yelled.

He was so mad at her, so, so mad at her. When did she get the right to do that? Because certainly she wasn't the best of a mum, as Louis remembered her and definitely she had no fucking right to appear at a Wednesday afternoon, when Louis was ready to go to his footie practice and then eat Chinese with Harry on his couch, the younger's feet tucked under his thighs as always. No, his mum, who hadn't even called him in weeks, appearing on his front door was definitely not one of his Wednesday's plans. Not one of his ever plans, to be honest.

''Louis, you know we moved!-''

''That's the thing, mum! You moved. You moved and never told me and a fair warning would be so nice. You left the house, that I grew up in without telling me! I never got a chance to see it because you've been selfish, as always.'' Louis snapped at her, the laughs and yells from his sisters could be heard even with the closed door.

''Selfish? What makes you think that, Louis?'' she asks, sadness clear in her eyes and voice.

''Forget I said anything, I can't just-''

''No, you have to tell me. You can't throw words around like that with no explanation.''

''It just- It always felt, like some boyfriend was above us the whole time. Felt like we weren't enough to make you happy and there are moments where I understand, that you wanted to get married again or whatever, but sometimes I just wished you could just be...there? I don't know, sometimes, I just needed my mum and she was too busy with a boyfriend or an extra shift at work and I then I was being selfish for thinking, that you should just be a mum. And it's just a vicious cycle of me being so angry at you-,at myself.'' Louis admitted, trying to stay calm.

All of those years of wanting to yell at him mum, to tell her, that he just wanted her to get her shit together and stop chasing after men, who will never be good enough for here, finally spilled out of his mouth. Every moment, that he had to stay up until 2AM to study because his mum was on a date and he had to babysit his little sisters. Every moment, he had to say 'no' to going out and have fun with his friends because Fizzy had a high fever. Every single minute of his childhood life seemed to be revolving around Jay's love life. Every decision he ever made had to be based on his mother's current romantic situation and it was so tiring and sad and weird and so fucking selfish on her part, right?

But wasn't it selfish on Louis' part too?

He wanted his mum only to be a mum. He did not want her to have a life, did he? Wasn't that selfish?

Sometimes he understood that he was on the wrong, sometimes fury was blinding him.

''All of my friends had a husband. All of them and they all seemed so happy and I had you and I was happy too, of course. I had my incredible kids, but I wanted to be like them, I wanted to have someone other in my life because I was just a mum. I know, it sounds bad, but I wanted something different in my life, something that wouldn't involve you or your sisters because I deserved it or so I thought.'' Jay explained, sitting on the couch and Louis sat next to her.

''If I could turn the time back, I would have never acted the way I did, because you did not deserve it and you were just a kid. You worked your ass off for this scholarship and were the best brother the girls could ask for. Honestly, without you I wouldn't have made it, baby. You are such an amazing son.'' she said, grabbing his hand and gave it a squeeze.

And maybe that was what Louis needed to hear now.

They could discuss the rest later.