Vault-Tec saved her

A Job is a job

I feel guilty I've not done anything to look for Shawn, I mean I've... I've um come to accept that he probably isn't a baby like I remember. If I was frozen for 210+ years, how do I know he was taken right before I dethawed the second time? He could be a teen now...an adult...just a body... Even if he is alive, who am I to just "pop" into his life if I find him?? Like

" Hi, I'm your real mom; you're actually over 210 years old like me. You were stolen as a baby as your Father, and I sat frozen. I'm just here to see if you're all right. I never saw a chance for us to have a relationship but now, seeing you grown-up, I want to try."

I would be a monster to do that...Maybe I am already a monster, though. Like I feel safe in my settlement, with my-my friends. Using as many chems as I want when I want makes me happy; my friends cheer me on when I got my nose piercing and when I dyed my hair again. I know some of them disagree with the chems, but that's only because they are worried I'll get hurt, not because it's "immoral" to use them. You know they didn't even...When I lost my left eye, aha... They didn't feel sorry for me? They just formed a hunting party and wiped out the group of gunners that took it from me...So yea, despite all that, I don't feel thankful I feel guilty that I have all this and that I don't...I don't...miss 'him.'

Journal title: That was quite the welcome

As the entry is titled, that was quite the welcome. (Date is December 1) I am feeling a bit better than I did on Thanksgiving; I've decided that I can't keep living in that headspace, so I'm getting on with my life and will deal with things as they come up, no more "wooh is me."

SO! I was following up on a lead for Jake, and the contact he led me to said some folks he heard of wanted to move and that my settlement would be a great place. I just had to go and find the people. NO problem. This first dude was in Goodneighbor...I remember hearing that name before but not from where...Hang on; I'm sure it's in this journal somewhere.

Okay, so I did mention it; I just never got around to visiting it. The walk here was a pain in the ass. Preston came with me as he said he knew the area reasonably well and could get me to GoodNeighbor without issues, but after that, he would be heading back to Piper( I know I shouldn't be nosy, but with them, it's hard not to. The way he looks at her it's enough to make me realize just how long it's been since I've been touched in that way. I mean, "he" stopped touching me a few days after we tied the knot. Then add the last few months? And you're talking 10...11 months? Ugh, fuck me...Damnet, my cheeks are getting flushed... back on topic!) That was fine. As I entered GoodNighbor, I was stopped by this dude who tried to extort caps from me. I not so nicely told him I would rip his spine out if he didn't leave me alone... He did. Only to be stopped on his retreat by the Mayor

This ghoul, aha fucking SAUNTERS over in a freaking red coat outfit like its dress-up day. They had a bit of a chat, which didn't go well because the Mayor went in for a hug and just stabbed the dude in the side. I can't explain why, but the whole scene was funny. So as I am there laughing to myself, the Mayor(who's called Hancock) comes over and says he's sorry and welcomes me to the town, saying.

"GoodNighbor is for the people of the people, you feel me? If you are looking for work, come see me in the statehouse."

I...Just wow, ahaha, GoodNeighbor seems...Nice. Not as bad as I've heard. The people in Diamond city are so...on their high horses and pretending to be "perfect." Diamond city is, meh but I like Goodneighbor.

Journal title: Art...If you say so

Today is December 8; boy, do I have a lot of updates. Mmm...Bobby...Pickman...The gunners or our expansion. Let's do the expansion first, as it's the only truly happy one.

So we had to expand Starlight Drive-In. It's only for 12 people, but I have 18 there. I did clear Tempines bluff a while back, so we are in the process of turning that into a small settlement. It can only really support six people, but I will deal with that when the time comes.

Now. The fucking Gunners. First, a group of them took my eye now this. Jake wanted to try getting the hubs 2-way radio working; this time, he went into the sewers( thank you for that, Jake) while I sat topside and messed with the radio trying to get a signal, and oh boy,,, did I get a signal. We quickly learned it belonged to the Gunners, and they were not happy. My first response was violence Jake, however, wanted to try talking things out, so we went to find them. Talking did not happen. What we found was a group of them dead and the person who killed them. A big fight broke out after the guy learned that Jake gave the settlement we were currently at ASAMS because apparently, the gunners were hunting down everyone who had them. Jake...I felt terrible for him and said I disagreed with the guy but, the guy was right. Even if by accident this was Jake's fault and my massive use of ASAMS has just made my two settlements a target.

Hancock's job...that sounded wrong. Haha, the job for Hancock...better. He wanted me to check out this place called Pickman's gallery...an art gallery? In the CommonWealth? Sure, I like art, but art made with the blood and guts of raiders? Not so much. I let Pickman live, though, because he's been killing a lot of raiders... He gave me a knife as a thank you(I have gave the knife to Hancock).

Now last...Bobby no nose. First, I am so over these jobs underground. I have to get Piper or Preston...scratch that Codsworth to come with me because she wants to break into Diamond Cities vault and take as many caps as we can carry. She said, take the next two days to get ready, so...I will. I'm going to get Codsworth and stock up on as many chems and liquor as I can hold...Bullets too, can't forget those.