math class | gwinam x reader

chapter 19 - are we still friends? can we be friends?

|||||||||| Present day ||||||||||

Y/N: Hey, can we please talk?

My breathe was shaky after sending the text. Shit. I thought to myself, there is no way that he is actually going to respond right. I began to panic, what if he leaves me on seen? Or worse... what if he ghosts me?!

I began to overthink the situation more and more my hand shaking as I decided to just log into my phone and unsend the message. What was I thinking that Gwinam and I could actually work things out. After three months too! God I am so dumb.

However, Just as I opened our chat to delete the message, I got a notification appear on the top of my phone screen.

1 Snapchat Notification:

Gwinam is typing...

Well fuck.

Gwinam: What's up?

Oh my god, Why did he respond? I thought many crazy thoughts to myself, actually wondering if I was dreaming. Gwinam responded to me? He actually wants to talk to me.

Y/N: I was wondering if we could talk in person. If you don't want to can we call?

Y/N: We don't have to if you don't want to though

I quickly typed up the message and sent it before I felt anymore regret than I was already feeling. I felt the small stone begin to fall into the ocean again. Except the stone was my heart and the ocean was my stomach.

Gwinam: I'm at work right now.

Fuck. I thought to myself. What if he doesn't want to talk to me. I turned my phone off and began to feel tears welling up in my eyes. I blinked them off and decided to message him back after quickly realising that I had left him on seen.

Y/N: Tomorrow?

Gwinam: Sure

Y/N: Meet me at the bus gates after school.

Gwinam: Okay.

I stared at my phone in disbelief. So I am actually talking to Gwinam... for the first time in three months.

That night, I hardly slept, replaying all of the possible situations over and over again in my head. They went from amazing to the worst possible outcome. I thought of him kissing me and begging for us to get back together (praying that that would happen) and I also thought about him not showing up.

I also tried to practise what I was going to say to him as I actually had not thought of that before texting him, because I half expected that he wouldn't even respond.

I practised my 'Hi'. Before practicing the best way the conversation would turn out... hopefully believing that I would get my boyfriend back by this time tomorrow.

|||||||||| the afternoon Y/N and Gwinam talk ||||||||||

I nervously approached him, I watched him cautiously looking at me from a distance with his beautiful big brown eyes. I nervously smiled to myself feeling butterflies erupt in my stomach.

I also saw him standing with a group of his friends, all of them wide eyed staring at me. I felt a knot of anxiety build up inside of me as I approached the group of boys.

Up close, they were all rather intimidating, coming from that fact that they were all taller than me and that the only somewhat communication we have exchanged with each other was them hollering at me and me rolling my eyes at them. I took one last nervous breath before opening my mouth and talking to Gwinam.

"Hi Gwinam." I softly spoke, almost coming out as a whisper. I mentally face palmed. That was not how I practised.

"What do you want?" He bluntly responded to me, slightly catching me off guard while his friends stared and snickered at me, pushing me to gain a little more confidence.

"Hey, can we talk somewhere where you friends are not all staring at me?" I spoke, only looking at him.

"Sure." He then again bluntly answered before walking with me a few meters away from his pack to where they were all not watching anymore.... all except one... fucking Jason. "So what is it you want to talk about?" He asked again, still sounding slightly pissed off at my presense.

"I wanted to say sorry for breaking up with you and-" I began however he cut me off.

"Whatever, it's in the past. I don't care." He interrupted me making tears form up in my eyes.

Great now I am about to cry.

"Can we be friends?" I quickly let out before my voice could break and the tears which were threatening to escape my eyes fell.

"Sure. Is that all you want?" He asked.

No, idiot, I still really like you and I regret breaking up with you and I miss you so much and I need you back in my life because I am lonely and you get me and all of the other boys cannot fill the empty void of which you had left in my heart.

"Yeah." I whispered.

"Okay, bye." Gwinam then said again before walking away back to his group of friends.

I allowed for one of the tears that had formed to slowly fall from my eye as I stood there. What did I expect? Gwinam is the school bully... Why would he be nice to his ex?

I began to feel the tears of which had welled up in my eyes began to slide down my cheeks.

Are we now friends? Or does he hate me?