Stay, Forever

37

"Okay, George," Wilbur starts, hands folded on top of his desk, "where do you want to begin?"

George blinks, but his mind is completely blank. He blames the terrible nights sleep he just had, he blames the constant nightmares that have been plaguing him for months, and he blames himself for agreeing to talk about it at all.

Because really, where can he start? He thinks that anything he says is going to make him sound completely insane, and he doesn't want to give Wilbur any reason to think he's actually lost it.

Nervously, George shrugs and mutters, "I don't know."

"That's okay," Wilbur's voice is kind, reassuring. He flips through the pages of his notepad, the one George knows contains all the notes from their previous therapy sessions together. George watches as his eyes scan slowly over the page, and Wilbur hums quietly before continuing, "so you've been having the nightmares since Halloween weekend. And I have here that the very first nightmare was about you getting kidnapped from a bar."

George's eyes squeeze shut, and it's like he's reliving the nightmares as Wilbur speaks them aloud.

"Right," George interrupts before he can keep going.

He doesn't want to relive the earlier nightmares, where he was kept in a basement and had no idea who his kidnapper was. He woke up each morning drenched in sweat and with his heart practically beating out of his chest, frantically searching for any sign that it wasn't real.

Wilbur watches him carefully, and George thinks that if he doesn't speak up soon, then Wilbur will keep going through his carefully collected notes. He exhales slowly, and tries to maneuver away from the details carefully, "there's some things about the nightmares that I can't really make sense of."

Wilbur's eyebrows raise up questioningly, and he asks, "like what, George?"

Another slow breath, and George explains, "well, both Karl and Sapnap are in the nightmares. They have been from the very beginning. But they weren't a part of my childhood, I only know them because they work here at the hospital."

Wilbur hums quietly, writes something down, and then gives George a soft smile.

"Well," Wilbur responds, "what role do you think they play in your nightmares?"

George has never given it much thought before, but he thinks about it now.

"I guess...they protect me," George answers slowly, "they both look out for me. Karl is constantly worrying about me and what happens to me, and Sapnap has saved my life more than once."

Wilbur nods, and then responds, "both Karl and Sapnap are friends in real life, so I think that makes sense. And since they work here at the hospital, it's their job to look after you as a patient and care for you. I think subconsciously, you're mind has put them into your nightmares as caretakers of sort, a way to make yourself feel more comfortable and at ease."

George nods slowly, because it does make sense. He'd never really given it much thought before, but from the very beginning, Karl had been an important part of the nightmares. He was there from the very first one, and he knows the nightmares would be ten times worse if he wasn't there. And even though Sapnap had played a very different role in the nightmares, he had also changed into someone who looked out for George. They both made the nightmares somewhat bearable.

In the quiet of the room, George thinks about how to bring up his next question. He thinks this one is far trickier to ask about, and he's half embarrassed as he opens his mouth to speak.

When no words come out, Wilbur quietly reassures him, "George, you can ask me or tell me anything. You know that, right? I'm not here to judge you, I'm here to help you."