Malicious Romance

Chapter 95

He was out of his head for a very long time. Ever since the incident with Kevinskey, the thought of Giselle had kept him distracted from thinking straight. Maybe it was because his lack of murderous motives and thoughtfulness, which open even a wider way for his enemies to find their chance. And, now that he was hospitalized, the possibility of the next attack to be in Las Vegas was even higher. It was all because of his stupid ignorant decision to choose his own life over his group and his people. Instead of standing up straight to protect what was his, he bent his head low for other mob bosses to punish him. Dean bit his teeth at the bitter thought. How could he be so fucking selfish? It was as if his life was the only one that has valued and deserved to have one. He was so fucking petty that he allowed such a thing to happen. Even in the name of being the Cobra's underboss, he had always hesitant to get blood on his hands. And, for every single time, it seemed to him that the more he was reluctant in doing the things he was supposed to do, the more that he would lose to his enemies. And what he hated the most was seeing his people leave. Ever since the departure from Giselle, he felt no different than dead. The heart that was once beat for her was no longer beating despite everything that happens. He wondered if the only thing that was to prevent him from losing more of his people was for him to be stronger. He was not sure if finding his freedom would make him feel any different from now.

What was the point of being free when you are trapped with a deep scar inside your heart?

Dean wanted to be out of the mafia life as bad as wanting to keep his people safe. He knew that without Giselle, his life decision does not matter anymore. There were only two choices. Either he chooses to leave and watches his people die in agony or stays to fight and die with his people. It was until now that Dean started to be convinced that the only suitable life for him was this life with blood on his hands. Because he remembered so clearly the day that his father tortured Giselle. He regretted his trying to be a good person. It made him feel sick to just think about that time. If only he was more ruthless and stronger, Giselle would have never gotten hurt. Not even a strand of her hair would have even fallen out. Dean regretted deeply just thinking about all of the chances that he could have picked up the knife and cut off all the hands that touch Giselle, even if those hands were his father's. He swallowed hard at the thought of him losing his possession due to his recklessness.

That thought of trying to be a good person should have never existed. It was all just a fucking deception that made him feel less guilty for every time that he lose to his enemies. If only that mindset did not exist, nobody would have been harmed under his hands. Nobody would have even dared to take Giselle from him. Not even his father would even have given them the chance to get any close to Giselle. Dean felt angry at himself. He felt somewhat delusional for believing in the wrong thing for almost his entire life.

If only he gets another second chance to breathe the same air as Giselle, his woman, his first and last love, Dean swears to never let her go or to let anyone take her away from him. If only he was given an extra chance, he swore to keep her protected regardless of having to spill other people's blood or his own. And he would be willing to do more than just become the worse criminal. Nothing would be able to stop him from committing more sins under his conviction.

After a long pause, Dean reached for his phone on the nightstand as he continued speaking. "You go back to China and take care of it. As for me... I will deal with what I started here." His voice came out more determined than usual.

Aaron narrowed his eyes before crossing his muscular arms over his chest. "Are you still going to proceed with the ritual? The shits that you went through were just the beginning. Those mobs had discussions during the cage fight. They were planning to fucking slice you up and break your fucking limbs. And... without me here, who the fuck will watch over our people? One mistake, and the Cobra will disappear from Las Vegas. There is no fucking way we will win if those fuckers decided to team up against us."