wanna be | ej caswell

⁸ walk the wire

sage sighed as she walked into the empty gym, she set her things down on the floor in a corner and sat down and began to stretch. she didn't usually use this room, often preferring the bomb shelter or the theatre for practice as she liked how they were more secluded. 

she pulled her speaker out of her bag and connected her phone, getting up a random track that she wanted to dance to. she picked one that currently was just an instrumental, choosing for no words so she could sing while she performed if she wanted to. she set up the little camcorder that she had borrowed from her mum, wanting to record whatever little tidbits of inspiration came to her in the moment. 

after the tension of the last few days in rehearsal and in life in general sage needed to release her energy in the best way she knew. she stood up as the melody of the song began, her body flowing as the words fell from her lips. she didn't know if she would do any actual dancing now or if she would just sway to the song but she knew she just needed the time to reflect. 

"went out the other night with all my friends. started to feel like me again, hadn't been that happy in a while. had drinks and we put a sad song on, you're oh, so casually brought up. there goes my night and goes my smile." she began to sing. her eyes closing as she felt the melody envelope her. the rest of the words of the verse slipping from her lips as she felt memories flash through her mind. 

when the beat became stronger for the chorus she decided to sit on the floor and pick up the camcorder as she sang to the camera, she didn't know why but she just decided to. "if I don't laugh, I'm gonna cry, don't wanna hear your name tonight. i'm finally happy, not in the mood, don't wanna think about you, if I hear your name one more time, i think I'm gonna lose my mind. don't know what to do 'cause I'm not alright. but if I don't laugh, I'm gonna cry, cry."

at some point she laid down on the floor, aiming the camcorder around the empty gym as she filmed what was around her. eventually she saw a figure in the view finder and she sat up and turned around. spotting the last person she expected to see, the words of the song fading from her lips and she locked eyes with him. the instrumental of the track playing as he made his way over to her, her eyes following his movements as he sat down in front of her. 

"hey," 

"hey ej," she breathed. he smiled at her, "were you practicing?" he asked her. she shook her head as she placed the camcorder down, not bothering to mute the instrumental track that was playing between them. "no, I was going to but then just didn't." he nodded, "I've missed seeing you dance." he whispered. she looked up at him, the camcorder had become interesting to her prior. she tilted her head slightly, confused. "you saw me dance in rehearsal and the auditions." 

he shook his head, "no I miss seeing you really dance, when you're just you. carefree and you." he breathed his eyes locking with hers. "I miss you," 

she looked away from him, a stray thread on her converse becoming interesting. "sage, please talk to me. it's killing me not having you with me." he slipped his hand under her chin and pulled her head up to look at him. she looked him in the eyes, his green eyes staring into her brown ones. "ej, you don't mean that." 

"but I do, you don't understand how hard it's been not having you with me, like we used to be." he explained, his hand moving to her cheek to push a few stray locks of hair back. her eyes fluttered shut as she breathed deeply. 

"was there something you needed?" she asked him, referring to why he came in the first place. he nodded, "miss jenn wants us in the bomb shelter to show us something." sage nodded and quickly packed all her belongings up into her bag before standing up. 

she looked at ej, "you really need to stop doing this." he looked at her confused. "you need to stop making me feel like you need me by your side when you have nini, it hurts me ej and you know why." she began walking away leaving him to sit on the floor of the gym and watch her walk away. 

"but I do need you." he whispered as he closed his eyes. his mind flashing back to before he left, a moment he wants to go back to everyday. 

sage laughed as he threw flour over her in the kitchen of his dads house. "ej caswell, i hate you. i just washed my hair," she complained as she combed her hands through it to try and get the flour out. said boy just laughed as he began mixing the cake batter they were making. "i think it suits you, maybe you should bleach your hair white."

sage poked her tongue out at him, "and here i thought you liked my hair how it is." ej chuckled before he put the bowl down and wrapped his arms around his best friend. well he thinks she's his best friend. things had been different for a while and a few people had noticed but no one had pointed it out. he swayed side to side as she wrapped her arms around his neck and smiled up at him. her flour covered hands coming to rest in his hair. "payback," she whispered. he rolled his eyes but pressed a kiss to her forehead. "i love you so much, I'm so in love with you." he blurted out. she looked at him before she smiled widely, "I'm so in love with you too ej caswell."

"ej, you coming?" sage called out from the gym door. ej was pulled back to reality as he stood up and wiped his hands on his jeans and walked towards her. she turned her back and walked ahead of him as he kept his eyes trained on her figure and she kept her eyes facing forward, knowing if she looked back she may not be able to hold herself back. 

"want you to live like the worlds on fire. want you to love like hearts don't break."

----

hi!!

thoughts, feelings, ideas of what you think is gonna happen? 

let me hear them!

- sunny