My Bubblegum King

37

Paxton Flynn

Diego lips almost touched mine, but my heart and head turned turned.

Now my heart started pounding and Diego's hand remain on my face. I heard him sigh and I did too, he didn't move and my hand reached up to touch his that was on my face. I felt him smile before I saw it.

"It's time to go home, isn't it?"

My eyes looked at his and if not that I've cried all the liquid out my body, I would have probably cried then again. I slowly nodded. "I'm sorry."

He held my hand and moved back, he had a smile on—not a fake one, a really genuine one. "I knew you wouldn't let me kiss you."

I blinked, "if you did, then why did you try?"

"I-I wanted you to know too."

I scoffed with a smile, "jerk."

He chuckled and we made to sit on the sand. He took huge gulps of his drink. "I've never seen love like this. I've never seen someone so in love with another person and I know I shouldn't say this but I'm so fucking jealous."

I bit on my lips, drawing my legs close to my body and relaxing my head on it as I looked at him. "I thought I loved you. At some point I probably did, probably still do but it is a different love. I was so scared I was going to lose Sebastian if we're not close. The long distance relationship I've always heard about never go right and I was so caught up in what I knew, the facts and numbers that I didn't realize that we did good. Could have been more perfect but Sebastian and I actually pulled it off. It worked and it wasn't the distance that tore us, it'll never be the distance if we keep choosing each other, every day, every minute and all the time."

Diego nodded, looking out to the blue ocean. "I don't know about Sebastian but I know you Paxton. And you're your best version when in love with him."

"We're good together too."

"Yeah, I can't lie, we really are," he copied my posture and looked at me too. "But good is not nearly enough, is it?"

I shook my head. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

"I really lost my shit. I heard about the bar and our future crumbled in my eyes. I hurt him and he probably doesn't want me back. It's been a week."

"If he loves you as much as you love him, then he wants you back. I bet he feels bad about what happened and he regrets his actions and understands yours."

"But then why didn't he tell me before he bought it? What if he doesn't trust me like I think he does? What if—"

"Hey, freshman," Diego cut me off and I blinked at him. "Calm. I bet he trust you more than anything but we do stupid things when we're in love. I bet he wants to impress you and you were at the forefront of his mind when he made that decision. He really wanted it and was scared about how you'd react. Not because he doesn't trust you but he loves you too much to hurt you and at that moment, keeping silent seemed like the best way."

I looked away from his eyes and up to the sky and my tears started rolling down again. "I want to go home."

People usually say the pain gets better each other, well, I don't think they were talking about this kind of pain. This kind got worst each day and I felt like I was being submerged into water, longer and longer as hours and days moved. They say there's nobody we can't live without; well, I guess they haven't met Sebastian Crown. They say, the sorrow only last the night and joy comes in the morning; if so why have my days been all night?

If I could go back in time, I wouldn't be so obsessed about being with Sebastian in school. I'd listen and hear him out when he tries to tell me about the bar. I'd hug him and tell him that it's going to be fine. I'd support him and share in his excitement. He doesn't have to abandon his dream for me. I love him and wherever he was, was home.