Sterek oneshots

Stiles hates witches

"I'm sorry, what?" Stiles says, and all he gets is a loud grumble on the side of the phone. He knew going to see his aunt in Bakersfield was a bad idea, but he didn't think that he was going to get strange phone calls two days into his trip.  

"We're sick." Someone, Stiles is pretty sure it's Scott but he cannot seem to place the voice, and Stiles wrinkles his forehead in confusion.  

"Sick of me being gone?" Stiles tries to clarify, and he hears a loud sigh that turns into a loud cough before someone snatches the phone away from Scott.  

"No. Sick with the flu or plague or something but I can't breathe though my nose." Liam, definitely Liam, tells him. Stiles pulls the phone away from his ear to stare at it in disbelief while shaking his head before going back to talking to the youngest pup.  

"Liam love, put Derek on the phone." Stiles asks, and Liam doesn't answer him right away.  

"Derek doesn't like it when we bother. He has a headache, which isn't fair. We all have headaches, except Lydia, so it's not our fault." Liam argues, and Stiles is already up and throwing his stuff into his bag while he balances the phone between his shoulder and neck.  

"Li, put Scott on the phone for me, buddy." Stiles says, and he gets one last sigh from the little pup before he hears Scott's mumbled 'hello'.

"Werewolves do not get sick. That's like the one good thing about you guys." Stiles says, and he gets a huff from the other side of the phone.  

"We might have pissed off some witches. That said witch might have made us human until the next full moon. And we might all be sick." Scott says, and Stiles sighs so hard he thinks he's made himself light headed.  

"I am three hours from home. Do not leave the Hale den, do not do anything, just go lay down." Stiles says, and Scott agrees. Stiles tells him bye before he throws the rest of his things into his bag before rushing down the stairs to apologize to his aunt before making the trip back home. "Fucking werewolves." Stiles mutters to himself, and he heads towards his car. 

****  

The first thing Stiles smells when he walks into the Hale den is sickness, even his weak human nose can smell it, he almost wants to gag at the smell of it all, and he heads into the living room where he sees Lydia, Erica, and Boyd all piled onto the small couch. The air mattress is blown up on the living room floor, they all have rooms why are they all in the living room Stiles thinks, and Liam, Scott, Jackson, and Isaac are all on it.

They're more on each than the mattress, and Stiles just stares at the dirty room. "What the hell is this?" Stiles asks, and all of a sudden everyone comes to life.  

"Stiles! We need chicken noodle soup!"  

"We need medicine!"  

"Stiles!"  

Stiles sighs as he holds up his hands to get them to all stop talking at the same time, and they all look at him.

"Okay. I want every single one of you to shower. Now. There are three bathrooms in the house, double up if you want but I want everyone clean." Stiles tells them, and they all look like that want to argue.

"Now." Stiles says, and they all huffs while they walk towards their bathrooms. Stiles catches Jackson muttering something about they don't have to listen to Stiles, but a quick glare from Stiles changes his tune as he heads after Lydia to shower.  

Stiles shakes his head while he heads towards the master bedroom to find out where his fiance is hiding during all of this, and he tries to be quiet since Liam told him that Derek has a headache.