Irredeemably Me

"Lauren isn't far."

The night was coming to a close and Camila knew her time with her best friend was coming to an end. She was more than a little drunk and her spirits were high but that didn't dissipate the impending feeling that the rush would soon pass and she'd be left with the inevitable goodbye. 

She'd said goodbye to Dinah too many times now and she didn't know how she could do the very last one. She didn't want it to be dramatic and she didn't want tears. She just wanted...simplicity. She wanted to say goodbye and walk away and it would feel like they may see each other again because she wholeheartedly believed they would. 

She knew in the next life, she would find her sister and they would build anew and it would be better than it was. They would grow old in each other's lives and Camila would meet Dinah's children and Lauren would be human with her, they'd grow old together. They'd have...a happier ending. 

The pair came to a stop at Dinah's apartment building after stumbling around for the better part of three hours, their laughter filling the bustling city around them and Camila solidified the memory in her mind. Maybe it would help bring her back from the brink because during their walk back to Dinah's apartment, something had become alarmingly apparent to Camila.

She didn't want to die. 

She didn't want to be consumed by the darkness she'd inherited from her mother and she wanted some kind of happy ending.

She wanted to meet Dinah when she's old and grey and she wanted them to share a tea on her porch with her grandkids running around while they reminisced on their younger lives. She wanted that with her best friend. The simplicity of...reminiscing. She didn't think that was too much to ask.

She wanted to travel the world with Lauren and she wanted to break down the vampire's walls until they were simply dust at their feet. She wanted to relieve Lauren of the guilt she knows the vampire has started carrying after years of pushing it to the back of her head.

She wanted Lucy and Vero to get married and she wanted to be there for it. She wanted to see the pair finally live the life they'd denied themselves for years and when it came time for Vero to move on, she wanted to be there to help Lucy move on and find happiness again.

She wanted a life with the people she's loved for so long and the people she'd grown to love over the short time of knowing them.

She wanted to be able to go back to Sinuhe and allow her back her memories so that she could properly say goodbye to her mother. She wanted to be remembered by the person who had given her so much to remember.

So when they stopped outside of Dinah's apartment building, Camila was ready to say all of that to her best friend. She was ready to let it spill out of her lips and cry into Dinah's arms but then their eyes met and she saw the hope in Dinah's eyes. She saw Dinah's undeniable and almost feverish hope in her. Dinah believed in her long before anyone else ever had and even now, it didn't waver. 

"I'll see you around, Walz?" The drunken, lopsided smile on the blonde's face made Camila's heart clench.

Dinah believed she would be back. That she could come back. That they'd have that sit down on some porch with tea and memories to reminisce on.

That was enough. It was enough to make Camila believe the same because she'd never defied Dinah's beliefs before and she wouldn't start now.

"Don't forget to invite me to your wedding one day." Camila nodded. "I'll keep you up to date where I am. Postcards."

"Like some corny rom-com?" The blonde scoffed before bringing her best friend into her arms. "Maybe postcards will be our always." She said dramatically.