He Has Changed (ON HOLD)

Chapter 58~ Home

He stays quiet when I speak again, this is what he does, he's always done this. Even three years ago when something or someone was bothering him he'd stay quiet about it and deal with everything himself.

I hated and still do hate it.

But he has to know he's not and never will be alone.

Seb avoids my questions as he keeps kissing my thighs, but the second he stopped and placed his forehead on my skin and took a deep breath I froze.

"I'm supposed to be strong Abby," he starts off in just a whisper but the way his voice shakes breaks my heart, I take a deep breath and reach down before forcing him to meet eyes with me.

I see those glossy eyes of his and motion for him to come up on the bed, he sits down and leans his back against the backboard before I throw a leg over him and settle myself onto his lap.

He wraps his arms around me as if his life depends on it and buries his face in the crook of my neck, "you are baby, you're so fucking strong" I whisper while running a hand through his hair, his body shakes as he lets out a small cry.

"He-He killed her." He whispers, those three words stop my heart as every single bad scenario runs through my head.

My eyebrows furrow as I pull back and forced him to look at me, the bloodshot red and glossy eyes of his just continue to worry me, I use my thumb and wipe his tears away, leaning forward and placing a kiss on his forehead as his eyes shut and his grip on me tightens.

Sebastian Morales

He did it, he killed her.

And the worst part was that he made me watch, he made me watch as my abuela told me to close my eyes and it would all be fine.

My own father killed the woman that gave him birth to hurt me, her life is gone because my father wanted revenge for god knows what I ever did to him. I never wanted anything from him or my mother, I wanted them gone.

I hold onto Abby tighter, afraid that he'll take her from me next. He's already tried, who's stopping him from doing it again?

I let out a sob as I buried my face against her neck, he took the woman that raised me like her own. He had people hold me down with countless guns to me, I tried running to her, I swear I did but every time I did something they'd throw me back to the ground and we'd be back to square one.

I saw the fear she tried to deny in her eyes when her son forced her on her knees and held a gun to her head, 'this isn't goodbye mi hijo' she told me with one of her beautiful smiles, but the fear it hid behind it ruined it. Those turned out to be the last few words she'd ever say to me.

My abuela is gone and it's all my fucking fault.

"Seb sweetheart, what's wrong?" she whispers lightly into my ear and my jaw locks as I take a deep breath through my nose, I need to tell someone, I can't keep this with me forever. Although telling my cousin might just be the hardest part of all this bullshit.

"My dad killed Abuela," is the only way I can think of phrasing what just happened to her. I heard her breathing stop, she froze as if she doesn't believe any words that just left my lips. I wish they weren't true.

Her hand lightly runs through my hair as she speaks, "Seb-" or well as she tried to speak but I cut her off before she could say another word.

"It was my fault, and he even made me fucking watch him kill the only mother figure I had," I can't help the sob that leaves my lips at the end of the sentence, saying this out loud is a whole different level of pain, it feels like when I said it out loud it finally registered to me that she's gone because of me.