I Never Asked

Chapter One-One last Ride

"Let me help you young lady" I hear as I go to throw the strap up and over the pallet of cinderblocks neatly lined up one after the other on the trailer I am going to haul next. I hand it over with a smile. I know this man like I know my own uncle or father if I had one. He always looks out for us "Girlies" and we always look out for "Pops". After one last check by me and then by him, just in case, I give him a hug and fresh cup of Joe and get ready to head out towards Lake Tahoe for a few more hours of rest before I continue on towards Houston to drop off the load and then, well I am headed back home if that's what you call it. 

Its the place I make it to a couple of times a year just to make sure its standing but its going to be my home and yours too I tell my belly. 

I unlock my truck and haul my wide ass up into my seat not so gracefully might I add.  After checking everything I need to inside the cab and changing out of my long sleeved shirt and into something more comfy, turning on my play list from my phone, I start out on the open road. Nothing like a little Bebe Rexa and Khalid mixed in with some old school country to keep me company for the next few hours. I smile. I love my music. Its something I can count on, always plays what I want and if not. Next. 

Half way there and already on my way up I swear I see snow flakes but it cant be. I mean wait, it shouldn't be. They opened the pass a few weeks ago after it being closed because of a blizzard and trust me I checked the forecast but lets face it there about as accurate as the sizing chart when buying clothes off line is. 

 I turn on my wipers and wipe it away thinking it must have been dirt or something. On I go. I see nothing more for another thirty minutes and then all hell lets loose err frosty must be puking or Olaf had the shits on my windshield. 

I want to pull over and put on my chains but in a matter of minutes I cant see more then a few feet in front of me and I get scared. I grab my mic and say "Breaker Breaker 21 This is The Blue Lady Express, I'm on Echo Summit, don't come up this way, its bad."  I hear a few responses and a few warnings to be careful because of a avalanche warning. I pat my belly and tell Peanut its okay. Mommy's got this. I slow down even more and hook the Mic to to my shirt. My cell has no service I am sure but my good old radio always has someone listening.

My copilot is in her seat and she starts to whine and I get this feeling in the pit of my gut something is wrong. Way wrong and my gut is never wrong. Other then the eight weeks I spent worshiping the porcelain god.  As I creep towards the top of the pass the feeling gets worse and so does the noise coming from Boo. My trusty sidekick for the last twelve years. 

As I start down the summit of the mountain a whole nother kind of hell breaks loose. I start to slide and warnings go off in the cab casting red blinking lights on the windows and roof. Thanking God I just got new breaks and tires put on. Even Boo is covered in the eerie glow of the major malfunction happening. Fuck me rough with a pinecone I mutter as I realize in a split second its the air breaks and I may not be able to stop. I have only driven this pass a few times and I cant recall if there is a Runaway or not and I have a long way to go to find out. 

I say a few prayers between the curse words and hope beyond all hope I can make it.  This is the last load before I take a four month break to have my bun and then back on road we go. At least that's the plan. I never take my eyes of the now white and slick road, but there is not much I can do. I cant test the breaks or I'll go into a skid, I let off the gas but going  down hill with a big rig loaded with thousands of pounds of bricks is not easy. I take more and more deep breaths as the the speed odometer climbs higher and higher, last look it was at forty. And I am scared to look again.

I make out a sign that says something 5 miles. I can do this, I can do this, I can do this I tell myself over and over again. Just when I think I have made it a set of lights appear in the middle of the road and I have a split second to make a decision, hit them knowing I would kill them with out a doubt and me and peanut too or go left over the bank and what I believe to be a cliff or right into the trees. With a look towards to the sky and "Please" I make my decision. 

"Breaker Breaker Good Buddies this is The Blue Lady Express Its been real." I swallow hard. Who knew I would go out this way. With a hard turn of the wheel all that can be done is done. its in his hands now and lets be honest here I have little faith in god at this point in my life but I ask him to save Peanut if he cant save us both. Knowing that even if just a they made it  God is good.