Jerrie Short Stories

don't ask, don't tell (pt. 3)

They haven't talked for the next three months following that night. Jade didn't intend for it to be that way  - she just didn't know what to say after everything that went down. What would be a better way to start the conversation?

Option A. Sorry I've been selfish enough to touch you just to prove you wrong,

or rather,

Option B. can't you see that I'm just as confused as you are?

The pregnancy test Jade had seen at Perrie and Alex's house was still in its package, unused. It doesn't matter, though, because it's inevitable that sooner or later Perrie will fall pregnant. It was so obvious that Perrie and Alex have been trying to have another child, and Jade wouldn't stop scolding herself for pushing so hard to break them apart when they were actually making big plans for a future together. Even if, theoretically, Perrie was secretly not attracted to Alex at all - how is that Jade's business? Perrie is mature enough to make such serious decisions about her life for herself, and it sure doesn't seem like she is suffering everyday with her little family. That's the reason why Jade made the decision to stop interfering with Perrie's life.

Meanwhile, Alex had, unhappily, accepted the new nature of his and Perrie's relationship. He wondered whether this is the fallout that all married couples talk about. They say that after quite some time with the same person, it stops being exciting altogether, and all you're left with is friendship and occasional sex. The thing that left him puzzled was the fact that Perrie and him have been together for five years already, and they've had their ups and downs, but they were never like this. When Perrie grew apart from him for a short period of time, she used to tell him why. It was her anxiety, or a friend who hurt her badly, or some career milestone she kept missing again and again. These temporary times of falling apart only made them stronger after a little while, since he was always there for her and she was always coming back to him. A hard time never lasted this long before, and she didn't even give him a clue about what was weighing on her so much.

It was Perrie who was left with everyone's disappointment. She could see the cry for help in Alex's eyes every time he asked her what's wrong (again and again), only to be given another evasive answer by her (again and again). She hated herself for more or less kicking her best friend out of her house, and not speaking to her for three months. She was alone with her feelings in a way she hasn't been in a long time, and that scared her.

Life became one day and then another, a routine that only held little bits of happiness thanks to her beloved Axel, who was the sun shining on an ever-lasting gloomy day. She knew that she owed it to him to be a happy mother, but she just couldn't figure out what would make her one.

Perrie was spending time with Axel in the backyard when Jade finally called, and she had  to remind herself to breathe before picking up the call. Then, moments later, Jade's voice sounded, and it made this storm of feelings that's been in Perrie's body quiet down. Regardless of anything, Jade still provided her with a deep, familiar sense of security somehow.

"Hello?" Jade said in a hesitant voice while the silence went on and on from Perrie's side. "Pez, are you there?"

"Yeah," she replied after another quiet moment.

"I know we haven't really talked in a while…" Jade half apologized, then asked, "how are you?"

"I'm fine," Perrie summarized, as if there weren't a hundred things she wanted to tell Jade. "You?"

"I've actually called to tell you that I'm moving," Jade shared, and Perrie could visualize the nervous look in her brown eyes perfectly, the one that always goes with that voice Jade was using as she was talking.