Broken Ice

i'm a mess

Sadie's POV

I felt a sharp pain in my stomach as I jolted up. Where was I? What happened?

Thoughts swirled around my head as I figured out where I was. I was... home. Like... like my real home.

My head was spinning and my stomach was turning. There was a glass of water next to my bed. I sat up and looked in my mirror.

Everything flooded back to me in a matter of seconds. Nevaeh and Claire kicked me out last night... I remember now. They lied to get me out of there.

I don't think I remembered that last night. I also remembered Tyler... he tried to make out with me. He tried to go further.

I took one more good look at myself.

I'm a mess...

My faded purple hair with my honey blonde roots... the infected nose piercing... my bloodshot eyes... my awful breath.

What happened to me? How did I let this happen? I fell to the floor and silent cried as I realized what I've gotten myself into. How badly I've let myself go.

I remembered last night the more I thought about it. With Darrel, Sodapop, and Ponyboy. They all seemed so sweet.

Why did they never care to help me before tonight?

I've seen them in the halls at school and I've seen Darry at his football practices in the park.

I know they've seen me.

Why did they never care?

Why now?

I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't do it. I hate it here and I feel like if I stay I'm gonna loose my mind.

I took one last look at myself. I opened the window as softly as I could and hopped out. Comet was outside.

"Hey, buddy. I missed ya." I whispered.

He started barking.

"Shh... shh... it's ok. Don't worry. Everything's alright. I'll see ya soon-" I quickly stopped myself. "I'll see you in another life." I said with a slight chuckle. It quickly faded when I realized there's a very real possibility I'll never see my dog again.

I ran.

I ran as fast as I could. As fast as my legs could take me. My head was pounding and I felt as if I was gonna throw up, but I didn't wanna stop.

My head just kept telling me to keep going.

So I did.

I was done here. I need to start over. Fix my fucked up life.

I made it to the train station and I was just gonna get whatever ticket I could get.

"Hi... I need to get on whatever the next train is. I don't care where. Just wherever I can get." I said, quickly.

"Hello, we don't allow minors to travel without an adult." She said.

"I'm not a minor." I said, quickly. "I have my ID with me." I said. I looked for my fake ID that Tyler got me. It was in my pocket last night. "I swear... it was right here." I muttered.

"Please step aside until you find it." She said.

I groaned. "Dammit!" I yelled. It must have fallen out of my pocket when I was in bed last night.

I looked around. There was a train on the train tracks. It wasn't a transporting train that I've seen before, though. It looked like it was just shipping supplies.

I ran to the end boxcar and hopped in. I wasn't gonna let this push my back.

I was determined to get outta here.

I hoped and prayed I wouldn't fall asleep just yet. I needed to stay awake while they did the inspection of the cars so I could hide.

Longest wait of my life.

Eventually, a few guys with flashlights came looking in. I hid behind one of the barrels in the corner. Then, after they passed, I snuck back out behind it and laid on the hay in the corner.

The train started moving and I felt my stomach turn.

Shit. I should have eaten something before I left. I had no idea where I was going. And I wasn't gonna be able to get back home.

I just love making my life harder than it needs to be.

The train didn't stop for hours on end. Probably days. I was starving by the time I got off the train. I couldn't go a second without my stomach making some weird noise telling me it was hungry.

I stepped off the train and reality hit me the second my foot touched the ground.

What is wrong with me?

I ran away.

I wasn't in Oklahoma anymore. I couldn't have been. It was impossible. I watched two sunrises. You can't go in a straight line in Oklahoma and have it take more than a day while still being in Oklahoma.

I must have been halfway into Canada by now!

I hopped off quickly and hoped nobody saw me. I had a few quarters in my pocket. At least I did last night. But my ID fell out, so who's to say they didn't fall out, too.

I felt around my pockets and I had four coins. Three quarters and a nickel.

The first thing I did was walk into a 24 hour diner. I had no idea what time it was; so, this was my best bet.

I ordered a milkshake and a burger. The girl must have thought I was crazy by the way I downed the meal.

I paid and walked out.

I wish I had asked the girl where I was, but I didn't want her to think I was crazy.

I looked and searched and prayed I'd find a place to stay tonight and figure out where I was.

It wasn't working.

I had to ask someone.

"Excuse me!" I said to a random stranger on the street.

"Hey, little girl. How can I help ya?" He said. I could tell he was looking at my hair. It was wildly uncomfortable, but i shrugged it off. It's not like I was spending my time with him.

"Where am I?" I asked. He gave me a confused look. "I-I mean what state am I in? I-I think I took the wrong train." I muttered, quickly trying to think of a lie.

"Oh! Why, you're in the great state of New York! You landed in New York City!"

New York, huh?

Well... I better get used to it.

I had a feeling I was gonna be here for a while.