Unrequited II F4 Thailand

Quality Time

TW: Tough, emotional conversations about cancer. 

9 years ago...

I felt a tap on my shoulder, stirring me awake. My eyes groggily opened, and see mom smiling in front of me. I slowly sat up and rubbed the sleep away from my eyes as mom asked, "How was your nap?"

I closed my eyes as I delivered a close-lipped smile, "I slept good," I yawned out. She chuckles and glides a hand through my hair. "This evening, dad wants to go to the park with the big red bridge. Do you remember that place?"

I recalled in my mind, the big red bridge and the calming sound of the lake. We used to go there a lot as a family. Sometimes, Auntie Cel and Uncle Ken would join us. Recently, we hadn't been there in a while, since dad began going to the hospital. I answered, "I do, mommy. Where is dad anyway? Is he still on the business trip?" Her expression shifts as she sighs, "He's coming home actually, he just stopped by the hospital, and Uncle Ken will bring him back."

She suddenly looked sad, and I tilted my head to the side, "Why is he always going there, mommy? I know it isn't because he wants to get stronger...he's always tired when he comes home."

Mom sighs as she pats my hair soothingly, "You smart girl, when did you get so perceptive." I stayed silent as she said, "You should ask him, sweetie. I can't explain right now. I'm sorry." I looked down, and my fingers played with the fringe of her dress. Mom touches my chin, making me look at her as she suggests, "Why don't we go downstairs, and you show me what your dad taught you on the guitar?"  

I grinned wildly as I hopped off the bed. I took my mom's hand and she shrieked at the speed I was walking. "I know a few things now mom. Before he left, we learned Sparks together.

"He's teaching you Sparks by Coldplay? Isn't that-" my mom asked, and I nodded as we walked down the stairs. "Your guy's love song. I asked him to, I liked the sound of it." Unbeknownst to me, Mom smiled at me full of love and appreciation.

Once we reached the bottom stair, I let go of her hand. I looked around the house and saw Auntie Cel in the kitchen. I grinned as I ran to get my guitar from the music room. I opened the door and turn on the strip lights in the room. I located the guitars and there it was, in its case–my mini dark oak guitar, next to dad's Martin D-28 acoustic guitar. I carefully took it in my hands, the weight is a little heavy even though it was custom made to fit my height. I walked out to the living room, mom and Auntie Cel facing me at the sound of my steps.

Auntie Cel clapped, "Oh, are we getting a show from Ms. Nova this afternoon?"

I nodded excitedly, "Sit down, mom and Auntie!" They softly laughed as they went over to sit on the couch as I sat in front of them on the futon. I rested the guitar on my lap and assumed my position. Although my fingers couldn't quite grip the strings strong enough, through practice, I learned to work around that obstacle.

I looked up at my mom and Auntie Cel and smiled, "Ready?" They nodded, and I placed my fingers on a C chord. I strummed to the song Sparks as best as I can remember. I sang in my untrained singing voice:

Did I drive you away?

I know what you'll say

You say, "Oh, sing one we know"

...

My eyes slowly opened as I saw mom offer me a sweet smile and Auntie Cel celebrating, "Wow! That was so good darling!" I laughed, "I only sang and played three lines."

"And those were the best three lines I have ever heard. You are even better than your dad!" Auntie Cel declared. I giggled as mom added, "That was an amazing performance baby." I felt a fuzzy, warm feeling in my chest as I smiled, "Thank you, mommy."