The Way We Were

2.11

Chapter 11

Ariel's POV

"Hello?" Cam picks up the phone after a few rings, and his voice sounds rushed. "I'm sorry that I just up and called out the blue, but I need to talk to you. Are you busy?" I ask. "No, not at all. Not for my baby sister." he says and I smile when he calls me that. It used to bother me so much but now that I know he only does it to bother me, it makes me smile. "I'll meet you at Pier View Coffee in fifteen?" he says and I agree before hanging up.

I grab my coat and bag and head out quietly to my car. No need to disrupt Zoey. I'll be fine. I drive to the coffee shop that Cam and I used to go to all the time when we needed to talk and park in the back. Cam is sitting at a seat in the front, sipping a steaming cup of what I assume to be hot chocolate. He never liked coffee that much.

Its dark outside, the streetlamps and neon signs giving off a warm glow. A breeze blows down the street, and it's neither cold nor warm. I join Cam at the table and a waitress comes over. "Tea please." I say quietly and I shove my hands in my pockets. "Are you cold?" Cam asks and I shake my head. I don't know what I am right now. I have to hold it together in front of him, I can't cry right now.

"So what's up?" he asks, taking a sip from his mug. "Luke." I say. I almost can't look at Cameron, knowing that if I do all I'll see is pity and possibly anger. "Ariel, why are you still letting this guy get to you?" he breathes out, sounding exasperated. "You don't think this is taking a toll on me, too?" I say, irritated. "I'm not saying it's taking a toll on me." he replies. "Yeah, well you're giant sigh implies otherwise. If you don't want me talking to you about my problems all you have to do is tell me. I won't bother you anymore." I say, and I start to stand up but he grabs my arm. "Ariel, that's not what I meant. Please stay. I want to help you." he says quietly.

I relax back in my seat as the waitress brings over a cup of hot water with a tea bag inside of it and a little jar of honey. "Thanks." I say, and dip the bag in a few times before adjusting my position in the cold metal chair. "Tell me what's wrong. I honestly want to help." he says. And so I tell him. I tell him about the speech Luke gave me on my doorstep and about the fair and the Ferris Wheel. I tell him about the café and his new girlfriend (if that's what you could even call her), and I tell him about Derek and how they knew each other.

When I'm finished, I sit back and breathe in the night air, taking a sip of my still hot tea. The warmth seeps over my tongue and down my throat and I feel relaxed here with my brother in the quiet buzz of the coffee shop and the streets of California. "You need to make up your mind." he finally says after a while.

"What?" I ask. "You need to make up your mind. Are you done with him? Or are you ready to forgive him?" he asks. "I'm not ready to forgive him. I don't know if I ever will be." I say. "Okay...but are you done with him? Are you ready to say goodbye to him?" Cam asks and I feel tears well up in my eyes. Because the answer to that is no, too. I'm nowhere near ready to say goodbye to him and what we have.

What you had, Ariel. Past tense.

"Hey, Ariel, it's okay." he says and reaches across the table. He laces his fingers with mine and squeezes, forcing me to look up at him. I didn't even realize I'd started staring at the ground again. A tear slips down my cheek and I feel embarrassed and sad and hurt and angry all at the same time. "It's okay to not know, but for your sake I think you need to figure it out." Cam adds and I nod my head. "This isn't good for you, whatever this is. Whether it's being with Luke or being without him or him in general. He's hurting you one way or another, and I can't stand to see you so upset anymore. You're my baby sister, I'm supposed to protect you from the mean boys on the playground and pick you up when you're sad. I'm supposed to protect you." he says and I can see that he's going to start crying too so I wipe away my tears and squeeze his hand.