Open Heart One Shots (Choices)

Too Late for Regrets

Summary: When Ethan Ramsey gets a second chance to build a relationship with his mother, he wonders if it's too late for forgiveness.

The floor of the dinghy motel room in Southie was littered with old newspapers and takeout menus. The wastepaper basket under the banged-up table in the corner was overflowing with carboard containers mixed with used syringes.

Louise Ramsey lay flat on the bed staring at the ceiling as she waited for the heroine to kick in from her last dose. The needle she'd used to inject the drug rolled off the lumpy bed, falling on the mud-colored carpet with a soft clink.

Sweat poured off her forehead, made worse by the window painted shut covered with riot bars and the ceiling fan that just recycled the warm air.

A voice on the TV chained to the wall droned on about some virus or the other in some godforsaken jungle somewhere. But she wasn't paying attention until she heard a name that had her lifting her spinning head off the thin pillow.

There on the flickering screen was a face that reminded her of one that she hadn't seen in twenty-five years; so familiar and yet so austere and unlike the man she had once loved.

"Ethan," she whispered with recognition before sweet oblivion took over.

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"Why did I let you talk me into this?" griped Ethan Ramsey to the woman seated next to him in the car as they drove to the rehab facility outside the city.

"Because I threatened to have you paged as Doctor Scaredy Pants if you didn't," quipped Cassie Valentine.

She didn't bother looking up as she flipped through the information folder Ethan had received from the facility ahead of Family Day. The weekend was intended as a group therapy session with the patient's immediate family members.

A couple of months ago, she had accompanied Ethan on the same route as he drove his mother to begin her drug rehabilitation treatment. With her encouragement, he agreed to give Louise a second chance, wanting to let go of the anger that had been so much a part of the young, abandoned boy.

Cassie had known, even if he hadn't realized it then, that any chance the two of them had of being in a normal relationship was dependent upon him giving his mother a second chance, even if forgiveness would be a long time coming. If ever.

Ethan gave her a sideways look. "Do you honestly think I would have cared about that?"

"Since we're almost there, I would say you did care," she countered, twisting in her seat to face him.

"Hrm," was all he said, turning his attention back to the road.

Twenty minutes later, he parked the car and switched off the engine. Instead of exiting the car, he took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose as he was wont to do when frustrated.

"Ethan, please talk to me," said Cassie quietly when he remained silent.

She reached across the console and took his hand in hers, lacing their fingers together. His thumb stroked the back of her hand and she saw him struggle to voice his thoughts. She squeezed his hand, letting him know she was here and to take his time.

Eventually, he turned his head towards her, his blue eyes stormy and uncertain as he stared off into the distance rather than make eye contact.

"We both know the cycle of addiction is never ending," he started only to stop before he shifted his eyes to meet hers. "Today is about following the steps, making amends to those that have been harmed. As a doctor, I know it's an important part of a patient's recovery..."