The Sea of You & Me

22. Kennedy

I don't know what the future holds for us. I don't even know what it holds for me. But god damn you better be in it. I don't think I'd be able to handle a life without you Parker. It'd be like a black hole. (This is the part where you tell me I'm dramatic, but I'm not). Just trust me on this one okay?

Funny how I didn't know what to say and now I can't stop writing things down. I'm sure going to miss you this next year, but I'm already counting down the days until you're home. Corny I know.

I hope you have the time of your life Parker. You were always meant to change the world. Even if you don't think so. Stay safe and see you real soon.

All the love,

Callum Ace McCormick

"I still mean every word," he whispered kissing the top of my head.

I grinned meeting his eyes. Even though it was dark I could tell his eyes were lit up. I didn't need the sun to tell me how beautifully brown they looked as they glossed over. It was the fact that he was seeing me. After all this time, after everything. He saw me.

"You loved me when I was my ugliest. And I don't just mean physically ugly. I mean who I was on the inside. I was the worst parts of myself and you still loved me." I breathed.

"You've seen me at my ugliest," he spoke softly titling my head up. He wouldn't let me look away not this time.

"I got an offer for next summer," I squeaked. "To work with the photographer for the Cubs in Chicago."

His eyebrows raised as his mouth quirked up. His dimples deepened in his cheeks. He looked actually joyous. "That's great, Kennedy." I knew he meant it.

"You're the first person I thought of telling," I continued. "You're my best friend. You're the first person I want to tell anything too. Even the bad stuff but especially the good."

I don't know when we had stopped dancing. Now we were just standing under the tree facing each other. I desperately wish I was in his arms still. I didn't know how much longer I'd hold myself up on my own.

"You make me happy Cal. But you aren't the only thing that makes me happy. You're apart of it. You're my happy something."

He tilts my chin up again. Meeting my gaze with that soft shy smile I love.

I love.
I love his smile.
I love him.

"The night of the wedding," I breathed. "It was the most normal I felt with you in I don't know how long. And I want those late nights and coming home to someone to sit in silence with or have random conversations. And all of that's nice but it's the person that I shared them with that's the most important."

"Say it."

It was barely audible. But it sounded like he was begging. He needed to hear this as much as I needed to say it. He needed me to finally tell him how much I wanted him.

"You."

He kissed me then. It wasn't an all consuming kiss like I needed or wanted. It was the slightest kiss that I wasn't even sure if it happened. But it was the fact that his palms cupped my face that told me it happened.

"I want you Cal. I've always wanted you. And I'm messy and we're messy but we can figure it out. We're a a team. A damn good team. And I want to figure out all the messy stuff with the best teammate I could have." I sighed.

I finally admitted it out loud. I put everything on the table. It was out there for him. Even if I only had him as a friend. I'd survive. We'd made it this long after all.

"That was a hell of a speech, Parker." He took my hands and pulled me into him. He wrapped his arms around me. Tight enough that I felt safe. "I should compliment your cooking more often."

I snorted. It was the only sound I could formulate after spilling my guts to him. I didn't know when I'd been this nervous around him. If he didn't say something quick I might spill my other guts.

"You wanna know something?" He muttered. I gave a quick shake of my head. "I just applied to a few internships for the summer, and Chicago was my top choice."

"What a coincidence," I mumbled.

"And you were the first person I was excited to talk about it with. Because I knew you'd be happy for me." He smiled rest his chin on my head. "I didn't even think of anyone else. Because you're the one person on my team that matters most."

"The night of the wedding, I remember sitting there next to you. And I kept thinking how I wished that I could do that with you every night." He smiled down at me. "But I was so content on us being just friends. Because we both said we needed to let that part of us go."

Uh oh.

"But I can't just let it go. I can't let you go. I want that with you. I've always wanted that with you. The good, the bad, the ugly. I'm your biggest fan, Kennedy Parker."

"Cal," I smiled at him. "I am so in love with you. It never stopped. I just finally stopped running."

"I was never going anywhere," he whispered. "I'm in love with you."

I kissed him then. A real kiss that melted the rest of the world away. I wrapped my arms around him and let him take hold. I never wanted to let this moment go. To let him go. Never again.

"What if I don't get accepted to the Chicago internship?" He asked.

We had eventually stopped mauling each other. Somehow we both had sank down to the grass again. Only this time he leaned against the tree and I leaned against his chest. His arms continued to wrap around me tightly. It was as if he wasn't going to ever let me go either. Good.

"We'll figure it out," I murmured. "We're not running from each other again. We'll figure it out together."

"As a team." He rested his cheek against me. I could feel his smile.

It was a moment that I wouldn't forget. My best friend, my teammate, part of my soul. He was finally mine again, and I was his. I don't think we were ever anyone else's, not really. Because it was always us.

My happy something that I'd swim into the deep end for.