Talk Too Much: Auggie's Story-H.S. Fanfic

The Most Unimaginable Pain

"I won't get hooked,"Emryn promises, but they both know it's a lie. Once an addict always an addict, it just takes one time and she's never been good with self control, it's always been her downfall.

"You were the biggest user I knew, Em,"Sammy remarks, looking down at Emryn's hand that's still covered by her sleeve and gripping onto the plastic bag as his heart sinks a bit at the thought of getting her hooked again. He cares too much about her for that to happen. He'd never forgive himself because she made it out. She did it, and now he's bringing her back in. "You'll take one kilo and be a goner."

"I don't really give a sh*t anymore, Sammy,"Emryn tearfully admits, mentally cursing herself for the tears that spring up in her eyes as she wipes at them with her pawed hand before angrily dropping her hand and sniffling, "why do you give two sh*ts?"

"Because you made it out,"Sammy murmurs, looking right into Emryn's brown eyes that are red rimmed, so much so that he knows this interaction isn't the first time she's cried today. In fact, it looks like one of the blood vessels in her eye has popped, showing just how violent those tears have been. "You made it off of the streets and seem to be doing well."

He looks over Emryn's shoulder and into the house that seems to be nicely furnished. He knows it's in a nice neighborhood, he could just tell as he was driving down the streets. Not the kind of neighborhood where he'd often do his drug runs.

He watches Emryn look down, almost like she's embarrassed to look at him anymore. Almost like his words are getting through to her. "And we were friends, I really cared about you and I don't want to watch you fall back into how you were."

He watches as her head remains bowed, her hand going up to wipe at her nose that's dripping a bit, her other hand squeeze the plastic bag so hard that she's afraid she's going to rip it, so she mentally tells herself to loosen the grip. She can't lose any of it. She needs it. She hasn't felt this kind of need since she was addicted. "I wasn't even going to come and give you this when you texted me."

"So why'd you come?"Emryn ventures, finally looking up at Sammy with angry tears rolling down her face, her black nose ring a bit skewed from how violently she was wiping at her nose.

"Cuz I knew you'd find a way to find some,"Sammy exhales deeply, reaching up to pull his black hoodie tighter against his head, "and I was scared you'd find something that was laced."

"I would've been careful,"Emryn responds in a whisper, her voice mangled from screaming this morning...and last night...and the day before...and the one before that. Angry sobs. They're different than sad sobs, she's learned. Very different.

"No you wouldn't have,"Sammy snickers, shaking his head and almost laughing before he remembers the magnitude of the situation, leaning his shoulder against the door frame of the front door, "I know you, don't even act like I don't. I've watched you overdose four times, Emryn."

"Thanks for the stuff,"Emryn quickly cuts Sammy off before he can say anything else that will make her rethink her decision, beginning to shut the door as Sammy puts his hand out to stop her.

"Why're you using again?"Sammy genuinely asks as the door vibrates against his hand, feeling Emryn continue to try and close it as he nudges his face through the crack of the door that's beginning to become smaller and smaller, Emryn disappearing bit by bit. "What happened?"

"My baby died,"Emryn states simply, almost emotionless as she stares Sammy dead in the eyes before slamming the door in his face.

*

It's like clockwork, muscle memory even, and she hates it. It shouldn't be, but it is. You don't forget how to do something that you've done since you were 13. You don't lose something you did for five years every day every hour.