I'm On Your Side

13 | That pessimistic voice of mine!

A/N: Up above is my impression of Mason's face—how his hair brown hair (I wrote brain hair earlier lmao) is styled, how his brown eyes look, and how his face is chiseled/shaped. I didn't think of this before, but I might also do an impression of Isha's face in the next chapter. Idk yet. God, this [message] was a long time ago! I remember writing this in Java class. Or getting the idea during class and then writing this on the bus home.

I'M NOT EVEN sure I'm prepared to see Mason's face. And not even in an anxious way. I'm just wondering if he's back to his normal state or whatever he was like back before he told Kyle about attending a therapy group.

Stupid Kyle, I find myself thinking. If it weren't for him, Mason wouldn't be this anxious. At least I hope he's not anymore. Yesterday, he was definitely anxious. I think he was lying too. I doubt a coach would have a practice after the season ended. Maybe a party. Actually, now that I think about it that seems far-fetched. Probably the guys on the team would throw one themselves. That is if they did good...

But that's not the point.

The point is that Mason was definitely lying and didn't he just tell me on Saturday those guys weren't even his friends, just teammates? Oh shit. Then why was he willingly hanging out with them?

Whatever, I think as I watch the screen load. He was probably lying about that too.

The history teacher's talking about some new project―fuck that shit―when I'm admitted into the Zoom call. I try my best to pay attention to what he's saying, but after a while, which is only five seconds really, I zone out.

There's nothing important about this project, or class, anyways. History shouldn't even be a required course. And even if it is, the school should be adaptable to what people actually want to learn. I want to learn more about Gandhi, not a review of what I learned in 8th-grade history.

The history teacher is finishing up his speech—finally!—when I return to reality and he ends the Zoom call. The fuck? I think and then a minute later, he posts this whole big announcement, which I don't bother reading, about watching a movie pertaining to the next unit.

I just click on the link, which is ironically an EdPuzzle. Fuck that shit. I hate EdPuzzles. With all their questions and awareness if you switch to a different tab. I hate this.

Yet I do it anyways. Because I need to get into college or whatever. Or maybe not. I could always get money from my stories. Just with a little luck and hope. But the Universe never works in my favor. Or maybe that's how it used to be.

I start the video, retaining as much information as I can. Not really. I'm just looking at it for the heck of it. I keep on having to replay the scene, though. The questions don't even correlate to the previous scene. Like, the fuck? This history teacher has really got it all wrong.

But he never did have it right.

I receive a text then from, who do you know, Mason. I'm actually kind of surprised. I wasn't thinking of him at all. In fact, I didn't even try to see him in that Zoom call. Is that good or does that mean our friendship or whatever is distancing? But did I ever look for him in the Zoom call?

Maybe. I-I don't know. I could care less.

Do you know the answer to question 3?

I don't even bother looking at my screen. I'm on question 5... but should I say that? I look at his text again, dubiously. For some reason, I have a feeling he's using me or something. And, plus, he's the one who gets the good grades, not me. Not that it matters. It doesn't, actually. I'm just surprised.

No, I'm on question 2.

Oh. My heart races a little. I'm lying to him. What the hell? Isn't he someone who I'm close with or something? But then again, he lied to me. Text me when you're there.