Seeing Red - BokuAka

21. Nap

Bokuto gulped, watching his nurse. She was a female nurse like he preferred but she had to touch areas close to very untouchable areas. It was just changing out his dressings but it was painful and he felt incredibly uncomfortable.

"Keiji," Bokuto whispered. "Keiji I need..."

Akaashi held his hand. "I've got you. It's okay. She's not going to touch you Kotarou."

Bokuto took quick and panicked breaths, tearing up. "I can't do it."

The nurse took her hands off of him. "Hey, it's alright. Do you need me to stop for a moment to let you catch your breath?"

Bokuto nodded hurriedly. His head felt foggy with an incredible fear that he hadn't felt since he'd opened up with Akaashi. Then it was a lot less since he knew he was safe but here was a public setting where he could get hurt.

Akaashi tried to calm him the best he could but he just cried and cried. Akaashi let go of him and went to the little counter in the room, grabbing latex free gloves. He joined the nurse by Bokuto's bed where she explained how to change out Bokuto's bandages. Bokuto still couldn't calm despite it being Akaashi touching him instead and started to fully panic.

"Red! Stop! Fuck!" Bokuto grabbed for Akaashi's hands to stop him.

Akaashi looked up, alarmed by the use of their safe word and the touch. "Kotarou. I would never hurt you on purpose, okay? We can take a break but this needs to be finished so you don't get an infection."

Bokuto shook his head. "I can't, I can't do it!"

"There's just one more piece of gauze and I'll be done. Then I'll make everything better."

Bokuto put his head back. "This feels awful."

"I know, trust me I know. It's not gonna feel bad at all soon. I'm going to make it feel okay just like always."

Bokuto flinched as Akaashi finished fixing his bandages and wasn't able to relax until the nurse and Akaashi managed to get him covered.

"Look Kotarou, we're done. Everything is okay." Akaashi sat on the side of the bed and hugged him. Bokuto held him tight, his fingernails somehow clawing into Akaashi through his shirt. Akaashi didn't mind the pain though and just held him. Bokuto could not stop himself from shaking and crying and being overwhelmed. This was a part of the healing process and everything would turn out to be okay.

Akaashi rubbed the back of his head, making soft shushing noises. Bokuto whined into him, only crying softly now.

"You've done so good Kotarou. It's not always going to hurt like that. Someday it's going to feel okay to be touched again."

"God I hope so. I'm so tired of panic attacks."

Akaashi hummed. He sat up a bit. "Don't worry, I'm not letting go. My back is stiff right now."

Bokuto put his head up. "Stiff? Why stiff?"

"I slept leaning over last night."

Bokuto stared. He gently moved Akaashi before squeezing him tightly. Akaashi's back popped loudly and he gasped.

"Kotarou!"

Bokuto laughed. "You're silly. Does that feel better?"

Akaashi nodded.

"You're blushing! Aw why are you blushing?"

Akaashi looked away, brows furrowing. "I am not blushing!"

"Oh but you are sunshine. You're blushing because I was being nice."

Akaashi's face kept turning redder and redder. "Hush..."