Chapter 13

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TW: homophobic terms and rape

As I was driving to Luke's, I couldn't help but think about how much I messed up. I should've never told Natasha about my feelings. Now she is going to hate me and never talk to me again.

I pulled up to Luke's and instantly got a bad feeling in my gut. As I walked in, I noticed the place was a mess. There was glass all over the floor and the painting on the wall was also on the ground. Maybe I shouldn't have come back.

"I see you came back. Where the hell did you go?"

I winced at his tone that was full of malice. He was beyond angry, probably the angriest I've ever heard him be. I turned around and there he was with an angered look on his face and a bottle of whiskey in hand.

"I went to talk to Natasha."

After her name left my mouth, he walked closer to me until he was right in front of my face. The alcohol on his breath was very prominent.

"Did you tell that bitch about us?"

I just stared at him, too scared to tell him the truth. Not liking my silence, he grabbed my hair and pulled it way too harshly.

"Answer the fucking question."

"I did. I also told her that I loved her."

A harsh slap was delivered to my face causing it to turn to the side from the impact. I probably shouldn't have told him that.

"Of course, you're a fucking dyke. I should've known when you wouldn't let me fuck you but don't worry, I'm going to take what I want now."

He then started to drag me, by the hair, to his bedroom. Once we made it to the bed, he threw me down and started to take his belt off. When it was off, he started to deliver blows with the belt all over my body. The only thought in my mind was that I deserved this. He then took the belt and tied both my hands to the headboard way too tight, I could feel the circulation cutting off in my wrists and hands. I started to thrash around when he started to take his pants off, and the realization that he was going to rape me started to hit. This only angered him more and caused him to deliver a punch to my face.

"Stop fucking moving and take what you deserve."

When I didn't stop moving, he pulled out a knife.

"Stop or I'll cut you."

This time I stopped, too scared to move. I started to get flashbacks to the red room when he started taking my pants off. Was everyone in the world treated like this or just me? Do I actually deserve all of this? Is that why I'm always in these situations?

A whimper escaped my mouth when I felt him align himself to my entrance. It eventually turned into a loud cry when he forced himself into me. Tears started to cloud my vision as he started to move in and out of me. I couldn't even think about what he was doing to me, choosing to focus on something better. The only better thing that came to mind was Natasha. She told me that I don't deserve this and it's just his mind games. Maybe she was right, I always tried to do the right thing so why would I deserve this? At that thought, I tried to think of a way to escape but I couldn't escape right now with my arms tied up. I had to lay here and just let him do whatever he wanted to me.

Once he finished, he started to untie my arms and I knew I had to play this smartly. I was going to wait until he fell asleep and then I would run. Of course, he fell asleep fast, stupid out of shape man. I then quietly got out of bed and grabbed my clothes, putting them on as I left. I saw the door was ahead of me and I was almost free until a glass bottle hit me in the head causing me to fall to the ground. How the fuck did he wake up?

"Did you really think you could get away?"

He started to grab my hair again but this time I fought to get out of his grip. I kicked the back of his knee causing him to stubble, allowing me to get out of his grip. I ran for the door and when my hand was on the knob, he grabbed my shoulder and turned me around. I then felt a sharp object enter and exit my abdomen, my hands instantly coming to cover the wound. I looked up and he was standing there holding a bloody knife with an angered but slightly surprised look. I used his shocked state as an advantage and grabbed the lamp by the door and hit him in the head, instantly knocking him out. I limped out of the house and to my car, leaving this hell hole.

On the way back to the compound, all of the pain really started to hit me which made tears start to come out of my eyes again. I can't believe he raped me and then stabbed me. I was five minutes away from the compound when the dizziness, from the blood loss, started to hit me.

As I stumbled my way into the compound and up into my room, I received many weird looks but I didn't have time to dwell on the onlookers. When I was on my floor, I knew I needed help but the only person qualified enough to help me was Natasha. When I felt another gush of blood exit my stab wound, I decided to say screw it and go knock on her door.

When I made it to her door, I could hear feet shuffling on the inside. It only took three seconds, after I knocked, for the door to open, revealing a stressed-looking Natasha. As her eyes met mine, hers seemed to soften. That quickly changed when she started to take in my appearance.

"I didn't know where else to go."

I started to get light-headed and everything started to spin. I guess the blood loss was finally starting to get to me. Before Natasha could say anything to me, my vision went black and I started to fall. The last thing I remember was her catching me.

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