Cuddle Buddies - Niko Vilhelm Moilanen | Blind Channel

Hurt / Darling

Since I still wanted to avoid talking about Naomi and Linnea, I tried to come up with a new topic to talk about but apparently Joe had more questions he wanted to be answered soon. „But what kind of a best friend is Niko when he fells in love with a person that is the best friend and apparently also supporter of the person who bullies you? I can't understand him. Don't you think you deserve someone better?", he looked at me and softly caressed my back. I couldn't deny that it felt good but definitely not as good as Niko's touches. Niko's touches made me feel even more comfortable and even loved whereas this only felt like a comforting touch by a good friend – probably exactly what it was meant to be.

„It's complicated", I sighed again. „Niko and Linnea went to a different school than Naomi and me and when I got to know him – which happened only a few weeks ago – they had broken up a long time ago. As Naomi Niko and me in Oulu, our hometown, she started talking to Niko and told him some bullshit about me. He wasn't happy to see her either because he didn't want to deal with a friend of his ex but as she behaved like that, he was really pissed and made her go away. He definitely wouldn't have hurt me so much!", I explained and defended Niko who definitely wasn't a bad best fiend but the best one I could imagine.

„Okay, let's pretend I haven't said that. When you say this Niko is good for you, I'll believe you." I nodded and now finally managed to change the topic. „I don't really feel like walking anymore, do you wanna come over to me? We could just talk or watch Netflix or whatever. I don't know. But I don't wanna be outside anymore or talking about these girls. I just wanna forget them", I looked at Joe, hoping he'd agree. „Of course! Sorry that I continued talking about this. And I also have to apologize for not telling them to shut up or pulling you away earlier. Honestly, I was shocked by how suddenly they came closer and started offending you. I should have reacted earlier", he looked down to his feet.

„No, don't apologize! This took me by surprise, too", I reassured and continued walking home. As we arrived at my small apartment, it was me who apologized. „I'm sorry for the mess in here. I didn't expect us to spend time inside, I thought we'd only walk. That's why I didn't tidy up the mess in here. I came here from Oulu about a week ago, that's why there's still some stuff laying on the floor", I said while making my way through some stuff I had thrown in some corner a week ago. „Oh, don't worry, my apartment isn't cleaner", Joe laughed at sat down on the couch. After filling to glasses of water, I joined him and started Netflix. Hopefully, this day will end better than it started, I thought before concentrating on the movie Joe had chosen.

Luckily, the movie was quite okay and truly distracted me from the shit that had happened this afternoon. But to be honest, it wasn't interesting enough to keep my thoughts from wandering back to Niko. Sitting here on my couch with Joe simply reminded me too much of how I used to do that with Niko on his couch. Again, there was nothing I yearned for more than seeing this man and feel his tattooed arms around me. Apparently Joe didn't notice that I seemed off during the whole movie because he didn't say or ask anything.

As the movie ended, Joe luckily told me he had to go home now. He didn't give me any detailed reason but I didn't need one. Honestly, I was happy he went home because I so badly wanted to text Niko, hoping we could chat a little, but I didn't want to do that while Joe was sitting only a few centimeters next to me. That's why I, as soon as I had said goodbye to Joe, grabbed my mobile phone, opened the chat with Niko and sent him a message.
„Hey, how are you?", I asked and contrary to what I had expected, he immediately responded.

„Hey darling <3
I'm fine, what about you? Had a busy day with many interviews and I'm relieved to finally be home. But I miss you :(.