Raising a Hero

Chapter 50

"Gus—"

"Don't say it's okay. It's not."

"It was still stupid and selfish of me to run off like that."

"What else could you have done to make me listen? Lilly...I thought I knew you better than anyone here, but I didn't bother using any of that. I should have known that someone like you, whose feelings and desires had been so abused and pushed aside, would've responded like that. I am at fault. And I don't expect forgiveness. But I will get better and I will grow up, I swear, so please...please don't leave me."

His last words cracked completely. He hadn't looked up at me once through all this, staying kneeled with his gaze to the floor.

I looked down at the bowl in my white and pink hands. The fire had gone a long way in thawing out what Miurian's coat hadn't kept off.

I knew I shouldn't just drop down and brush it all away, that wouldn't fix things nor would he believe that I'd really listened to him. And there was still a dark ache in me from revisiting the fact that I was still alone, that I still had empty arms, and that I still had the problem of not knowing how to proceed from here in accomplishing my mission in this world. Nor what I'd do afterwards.

In the back of my mind, the heavenly dream drifted past.

I put the soup aside by the stool Milly had sat me on and went to kneel in front of him. Gingerly, I put my arms around him and nuzzled my face into his soft silver hair, as I had done so many times already. His familiar smell came to me, not musky or spicy, but not bad either. But it was him, like blankets and favorite old shirts, bread in the oven, and beautiful blue mornings.

"I like you," I said. "I like you a lot."

He didn't hug me back, but I could feel wetness from where his face pressed into the light blouse of my dress.

"I'm not going to abandon you. Even if it is your fault, I'm sorry for running away. I won't do it again. I promise."

I didn't know if that's what he was wanting to hear, but he finally hugged me back once I'd said it.

Milly came up then, knocking her knuckles on the doorframe to announce her presence.

"Don't mind me. You two finish making up."

Which reminded me. "Gus, Hal didn't get mad or you or anything, did he?"

"Of course he did," said Milly. "The kid started the fight, didn't he?"

"Milly."

"No one beat your baby, Lil'. We'd never do that."

I expected Gus to protest at being called my baby again, but he didn't so much as stir.

"I only gave him some advice," said Hal, who had appeared in the doorway as though by magic. "Hoo, you don't look much better than him. Did you cry or get punched in the eyes?"

I let go of Gus and scowled at Hal. But, of course, the older man only gave me that hot chocolate smile of his. He came over to pat my head.

"I'm glad you're safe," he said.

I took a turn hugging Hal and Milly in turn before finally returning to my soup. Gus disappeared sometime during that without so much as a sound, making me worry. But he didn't seem much worse for wear when he met me on my way to bed and initiated the hug with me, which was probably a first. He wasn't all that into physical contact. That was all me.

"Could you let me know when you get that letter from Sir Dustove?"

"Sure. Did you want to send him a letter?"

"Yes. Just...to ask a favor."

"Hey, you can talk to whoever you want. And you healed his eyes, so you probably have part in that favor he offered too." I ruffled his hair, wishing I could hug his head all night like some weird silver teddy bear. They grew up too fast...even if he'd never been mine.

He seemed to sense my thoughts, though I didn't feel his magic, for he pulled back to give me his famous disproving frown. He'd make a great school principal one day.

"You're thinking bad stuff. Stop."

I just smiled. "I'll try. Sleep well, Gus Gus."

"You too." He reached up to brush some of my hair behind my ear as he stepped away. "Have only good dreams."

"Hopefully my brain obeys your command."

And it did.

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 You're only reading this to see if my children or cat are doing something strange, which they are, thank you very much. They're maniacs. And the perfect Sim replica of my family is also going along quite well. Wait, there was a reason to this...have you checked out the published book yet? Because I'm not putting up these free chapters forever. I'm lame like that. You know, expecting my hard work and bachelor's degree in writing to amount to something. My fanfictions are free though. That sounds like a Beetles song: Fanfiction is Free.

Here's da link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CS2V2XPV