After The Run Away: Jason McCann: 3rd book to Dont Fall For The Criminal

Chapter 29 - No One Is To Blame

"That's not my point" she snapped at me. "I could have fixed my relationship with my father. But I didn't because I thought you were far more important. That's not okay. That's not right!" She yelled again.

I need to try to keep my calm because this is only because she is hurting and also her mom is standing right there.

"If you wanted to talk to him, you could have. I never once stopped you because I knew how much family meant to you. That was your decision" I said calmly.

Again, I need to stay calm. I'm trying hard, I do not like being yelled at.

"You don't get it! You-" I cut her off quickly. Her yelling was getting me annoyed.

"You think I don't get it?" I snapped back at her. She didn't seem surprised. Maybe this is what she wanted. A fight. "I do get it! I held you while you cried about him every single time!" I raised my voice at her. "You are grown and you always made your own decisions!" I said and she went to talk, but I continued. I'm ending this. I'm putting in the last word. "And you think I don't understand the pain you feel right now?" I asked loudly and her face softened a bit. "You know the story about when my parents died. About how the day before they passed, I got into a huge fight with my dad and refused to talk to him until he apologized. Even though I was the one who was in the wrong. I had to live with that. I was only fourteen years old. And I had to live with that pain, the regret, wanting so badly to just say 'I'm sorry for everything wrong I did' and to be able to say goodbye. But I couldn't. Neither can you. You will just have to learn how to deal with what happened and learn how to grieve and move on" I snapped at her. She just stared at me with sad eyes as tears ran down her face. I just shook my head.

"I'm sorry" she quietly said as she started to sob.

"You don't have to say sorry" I said back and crossed my arms. "Just do not take this out on me. I do not control your actions. The same way you always made time to talk to your mom and even your brother who hates me, you could have done that. I never stood in the way. Ever. So don't do that" I said back still calmly. She nodded.

"I need a minute" she said quietly then ran up the stairs. I sighed loudly and looked down at the ground.

"Want to step outside?" I heard Mack's mom ask. I looked up at her then nodded.

"I'm sorry about your loss" I said to her before we started to walk towards the door.

"Thank you" she said back quietly. We walked outside and sat down at the table.

"You seem okay" I told her. She shrugged.

"I don't think it's really hit me yet." She said back and I nodded. "You had a lot more patience than I would have had" She joked with me.

"I understand her pain and wanting to have someone else to blame. And I understand what it's like to lose people. I lost my older brother, my little sister, both my parents, one of my best friends. I learned how to grieve, how to deal with the pain." I explained to her.

"I'm so sorry Jason" She said shaking her hand. "No one should have to go through that."

"Yeah it was tough" I said back nodding.

"Is that why you joined a gang so young?" She asked and I shrugged.

"Well yes, but my older brother was apart of the gang first. My father was as well. A few months after my parents died, I turned 15 and begged my brother Alex to put me in the gang. And after a lot of begging, they let me in. It was a way for me to have a distraction. Not a very good one, but it was something" I explained she slowly nodded listening to me.