KPOP ONE SHOTS {REQUESTS CLOSED}

ONE SHOT 23 - MY BROTHER'S BEST FRIEND - || TAEYANG - SF9

I put my phone down on the kitchen counter, the Kakao chat with my best friend still opened. I bite my lip, trying to hold back my tears and negative thoughts. I've never had a lot of friends and honestly, I was always okay with that. I have one best friend who lights up my world like an actual sun. I do not need anyone, as long as I have her in my life. But things are different the past few weeks. She has been acting weird. I might be wrong about the whole situation, but it feels like things are off between us. Did I do something to anger her? Did I do something to upset her? No matter how much I think about it, I cannot seem to find an answer. I asked her a couple of times if there was anything going on or if she was mad at me, but she said that everything was fine. She is always like this: not sharing her pains with me. But that is what we are friends for, right? 

The past few days she gave me the idea she did not want to have to do anything with me anymore. We used to talk or chat every single day, sharing all our happy, angry and sad moments. But now she is barely reacting to my texts and I am the one who has to start the conversation otherwise she will not say anything to me for the rest of the day. It feels like I am the only one who is currently putting any efforts in this friendship. But it has to come from two sides to make something work. Especially things like friendships and relationships.

Then again, I might be mistaken about the whole situation. I know she has a lot to deal with right now: she is soon going to graduate this year and she has a lot of things to arrange for her final internship. But way take it out on me? Is she that busy that she does not even have time left to answer my messages? Does she have no energie left to sound at least a little enthusiastic when I tell her about something that happened in my life? 

Or is it all my fault? Am I the one acting differently? I shake my head, no that cannot be it. I am the same as before. I am sure of it. Right?

I miss her though. She always used to be the one and only reason for my smiles. Now I curl up in my bed at night and cry, wondering what I did wrong. Wondering why even my best friend starts to hate me now. It really feels like I am losing my best friend and god damn, it hurts like hell. But I can't force her to talk with me or to stay by my side if she does not want to. Maybe our friendship reached its limit, maybe it is time to end things. To set her free, since she is clearly not enjoying her time with me like she used to. Things like that happen. People can get sick of each other after some time. We see it happen all the time.

I wish I could have done something to save our friendship though. Anything. If only I was a good friend to her, a friend she really needs. I wish she trusted me with her problems. I might not be able to solve all of her problems, but I could at least listen to them. I could offer her a warm embrace when she got stuck in those cold thoughts of hers. Cause I know she has those from time to time. I want to be there for her, if only she would let me. 

My eyes fall on my phone screen: she is online! I grab my phone, hopeful that my friend will finally answer my messages. But once I grab my phone, she is offline again. She went offline again, without even looking at my messages. My eyes start tearing up. I should not make such a big deal out of this, I know that, but it really hurts. How can she just ignore me like this? I put my phone away, shoving it to the other side of the kitchen counter. It is better for me to not look at my phone for now. It will only hurt me more and more

"Am I really such a bad friend? Do you not want me in your life anymore?" I mumble, trying my best to hold back the tears. But soon the first teardrop falls down my cheeks, opening the way for a river of tears streaming down my cheeks. I fall down on my knees, curling up on the ground with my arms wrapped around my legs. "I hate myself. I am such a disappointment." I mumble, my voice starting to get a little hoarse. "Nobody wants to be with me, everybody hates me."

A pair of footsteps approaching me make me look up. My eyes feel puffy and I know for sure I have snot running out of my nose. Not my most charming look. I am startled when I see my brother's best friend standing in front of me. "Taeyang?" I stutter, I did not even know he was with my brother. If I had known that he was in the house I would have locked my crying self up in my room. Why am I even sitting in the kitchen? 

"Hey are you okay?" he asks. Well, obviously I am not. But I cannot bring myself to say something like that. Instead I just shake my head, already feeling tears coming up again. Ugh, why am I so emotionally unstable? I am bawling my eyes out because my best friend is ignoring me, it's not the end of the world. 

But it feels like the end of my world. 

Taeyang kneels down next to me, looking at me with those big brown puppy eyes of his. I hate it that my older brother has such a handsome friend. It is just unfair. 

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" he asks. He and my brother have been friend ever since kindergarten. Taeyang is not only handsome, but he is actually a good guy. He always cares about me and is worried for me. More than my actual brother is. I would lie if I say I do not have a slight crush on him. Come on, he is practically a prefect boyfriend. Who would not love him? But then again, he is my brother his best friend. I would never make a move on him. Not that I have the balls to make a move on someone. 

Taeyang hands me a tissue, I do not know where he got it from but I gratefully take it from him. I dry my tears and blow my nose, taking a deep sigh before I finally decide to answer his question. "I feel like I am losing my best friend and it is killing me." my words as soft as a whisper. "She has been acting all weird the past few days and now she is ignoring me too. I don't know what I did wrong." I sob, my lips forming a pout. "Come here." Taeyang pulls me in a tight hug, wrapping his strong arms around my tiny body. He has never hugged me before so I am a little startled at first. But soon I relax and wrap my arms around him too. A hug was just the thing I needed. I always feel better after a hug, but how did he know that was what I needed?

"Friendships aren't always easy, Hwiyoung and I fight a lot too." he says, softly rubbing my back. His arms feel nice and secure. I feel comfortable like this. "You and my brother fight?" I am surprised by this new information, they always seem so close. Taeyang laughs. "Well... More like arguing, but yes, we do quite often actually. But you know, even though we have our differences, we do care about each other a lot. We always makeup quickly." 

I sigh, still holding onto the older boy. "I think my friend and I are a little different. Things aren't going well between us for some time now and she does not want to talk to me." I bite my lip, feeling more tears coming up. But I hold them back. "Give her some time, maybe something is going on. We all have things we don't want to share with someone else, not even our friends. It might be too painful or too personal. Or maybe your friend does not know how to put her feelings to words. Give her some time, things will get better." I look up at Taeyang. I never knew he could be this serious. 

"What are you doing here by the way?" I ask suddenly realising the whole situation that I am currently in. "I wanted to grab a drink, your brother told me to get it myself." Taeyang explains. He stands up and lifts me up too. "Well, I am thankful that he made you go yourself." I mumble, looking down at the ground. A little silence follows and I start to think I made a wrong comment. "I-I mean, cause he would have never given me any good advice. He would have probably just ignored me." I then explain, but when I look at Taeyang I can see a mischievous smile on his lips. "I am glad too." he says, opening the fridge to finally grab his drink. "That I was able to see you and comfort you with a hug." he adds, making my cheeks turn a little red. He gives me one last look before he goes back to Hwiyoung his room.