Wholesome Deltarune Oneshots

Spamton- Short Lived

You frowned at him. "What the h*ll is 'Hyperlink blocked' supposed to be...?"

His eye twitched. "It's-"

"Hold that thought, I'm gonna stand up," you told him, doing just that immediately after while his beady eyes stared you down.

Once you were on your feet, you looked down at the formerly intimidating fellow. And you started laughing. "Oh man! I was actually kind of terrified of you for a second there, but looks like I had no reason to!" you laughed.

"What are you [Talking About It For Days]?!" he asked, bristling as he struggled a bit to tilt his head up to look the two feet higher than his own height.

"Well, look at you! You're tiny!" you chuckled. "Probably just about as dangerous as a little puppy!" I'm so used to looking up or straight at people... you thought. It's kind of strange to have someone to look down at... Definitely not something I can do if it's Swatch or a Swatchling; they're huge!

His teeth gritted together just enough that you could notice it. "THIS IS [NOT PART OF THE DEAL] TIME! FOCUS ON THE [DEAL]!" 

You bent down to meet his eye level and his face reddened. Furiously or out of embarrassment, you weren't sure which. Possibly both. "You're like, what... 3 foot?" you teased.

"I'm AT LEAST [4 For The Price of 2] foot!" Spamton snapped, and yet you couldn't help but find it only cute and not in the least bit intimidating.

"Aww, whatever you say, tiny salesman," you cooed, patting his head with your hand. Whoa, there's lots of hair gel in this... you realized. No wonder his hairdo could survive in a place like this.

That set him off into a tantrum of yelling about how he was a big shot and that you wouldn't be making fun of him if he was working in the Queen's palace. It was kind of precious to watch him stomp around, waving his arms wildly, but you found yourself glancing around the alleyway. 

Actually, this is kind of sad... Does he live here...?  You wondered. A small guy like him could get creamed out here... I wonder if he would let me take him with me? Seeing him continue to yell about deals and something about a disc and a basement or something, you couldn't help but smile faintly to yourself. No, he wouldn't allow that. Especially after I just insulted his height. Twice. Three times? Yeah... You sighed. But I got to try anyways. Now I'll just feel guilt if I'm getting to go to a nice house while he's stuck out here.

"Hey, little guy, do-" You stopped, seeing that where he was standing... he wasn't standing anymore. "Hey, where'd you go?" you cried, looking around. He had vanished without a trace while you had been distracted, which you admittedly had not expected.

Finally, they're leaving... Spamton thought grumpily from behind a pile of garbage bags, watching you turn towards the exit of the alleyway. He hopped out from behind the trash, jogging up to the corner to peer out of the alleyway and watch you walk down the street. 

His gaze then went to your uniform. He squinted. Wait a minute... I could recognize that uniform from anywhere. His eyes widened. They work for the Queen?! This could be my chance, to get BIG, to BE BIG! He scurried after you, making sure to keep his distance.

He silently followed you, which was hard when his chatty business man instincts kept making deals almost escape his mouth. He clamped his mouth shut with his hand to keep himself quiet.