"You look beautiful." I tell Savannah.
She gives me a half smile, a short agitated "thanks". I know she doesn't trust me, all the hostility is her being protective and I'm not sure how to show her I've changed. Or I'm changing, I'm trying.
James and Wes are at the bar, Wes drinking non-alcoholic drinks, James not so much. He's having fun, loose from a variety of drinks already, bubbling with laughter and excitement as he bounces between people.
Savannah is fixated on Sawyer as he throws his arm around Laurel.
"Is something going on between them?" I ask.
At some point as Sawyer slowly worked his way back into our friend group, Laurel's complete annoyance with him dissipated slightly.
Savannah though finds my question ridiculous, snorting through her nose as she says "please". I've also wondered if Savannah and Sawyer don't harbor deeper feelings for each other. Feelings both are too afraid to act on.
But Savannah glances at me, her eyebrows knit before she stalks off toward them. I'm no stranger to jealousy and that seems like jealousy. I don't dwell on it though, thankful Savannah has a distraction from me. Instead I slip through the crowded bar we're at, finding James talking to some people as he waits for drinks.
I've been trying to stifle down any unease I have. I'm trying to be more like Dom, more comfortable with public shows of affection. It's hard though, it leaves me anxious and a little sweaty, my eyes darting around to the other people in the bar, wondering if they're judging me.
James spots me as I make my way to the bar, waving me over as drinks appear beside him. He clutches a dewy glass in his hand, his arm reaching out to wrap around my shoulders and pull me close.
I catch the tail end of a story the man James is talking to is telling, something about his car and his teenage son. The woman that stands beside him, shaking her head at the shenanigans, she smiles at me and I try my best to ignore the tension that ripples through me. My mind screaming we're too close, we look too close, we look exactly like what we are.
"This is Millie and Dave, we work together." James tells me. "This is Brett my" the gusto he has introducing his coworkers fades though as he reaches my name, unsure of what to call me, what I'll accept.
It's easy to say it in my head, natural really, to just let the word slip off my tongue but as I open my mouth to do just that it lacks confidence. "Boyfriend."
Instantly I drop my head, shame finding its way to the forefront. I'm waiting for it, for the rejection, the disapproval. Steeling myself for it, so I might be able to take the hurt away ever so slightly.
But Millie's hand juts out into my line of sight, nails filed to sharp points and painted red as she says "it's so nice to meet you!".
I look at James first, panic at the edges of my subconscious but I'm met with a smile. A beautiful, full blown, heart stopping smile. A smile that causes everything to fade away until it's James and I and the way he's looking at me and for the first time in forever I feel like I'm right where I should be, doing exactly what I should be doing. There's no fear, there's no shame, no questions that linger in my mind. There's just this guy that I love and at this moment, all my mistakes over the years don't exist.
James pulls me a little closer and I turn to shake Millie's hand, Dave's after.
"We were wondering when this guy was going to settle down." Dave says, grinning at James.
I'm stunned, standing their slightly bewildered as James' coworkers so easily accept that we're gay or rather I am. It seems impossible for it to be that easy, that it's not met with disgust and disapproval and I stare at them wide eyed and speechless.
James laughs, taking a drink and says "now Millie just has to find someone."
"Men suck." She groans, adding a quick "no offense".
But we lose her attention as a guy walks in, someone Savannah and Sawyer know apparently. The four of us watch from a distance as he gives Savannah a hug, a courteous nod passing between whoever this guy is and Sawyer.
Curiosity has me asking "who's that?"
And James tells us "Sawyer's roommate Cairo."
"He's hot." Millie adds.
Dave let's out a chuckle that lends more to an amused dad than a coworker and says "I'm going to take off James, gotta make sure the kids are still alive."
"I'm going to go introduce myself." Millie announces. "See you at work Dave."
I stay tucked under James' arm as Dave tells me it was a pleasure to meet me and I tell him the same. I'm comfortable and relaxed and relieved. Maybe a little amazed that I managed to tell James' coworkers that I was his boyfriend.
"Brett." James' voice rumbles in my ear. His breath is warm, fanning out against my neck, sending goosebumps rushing over my skin and desire soaring through my body. I mean to say something back, his name, anything, but words get caught in my throat and I just end up gawking at him.
"That was by far the best birthday present I've ever gotten."
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Now that I told you there's only a handful of chapters left, who wants to know what's coming next?
