𝑳𝑶𝑽𝑬 | Meanie ✔︎

-Chapter 8-

Wonwoo’s pov

    One month has passed since the start of my second year and it’s also been a month since I started working with Junhui at the pet shop. I guess it is not bad working there since I get to see dogs and cats every single day and it’s never boring. I also got to learn how to give showers and grooming for the dogs since Haneul noona suggested to teach me how to do it in case there’s a shortage of staff. To be honest, it’s really fun and on the bright side you get to pet them every single day, who would say no to that right?

   Alright back to present time, it was a Friday but I took a day off for today and tomorrow since I wasn’t feeling well, I started having bad stomach cramps and a slight headache this morning. In case you’re wondering what caused these symptoms, I’ll briefly explain it. Apparently, I have this condition called Persistent Mullerian duct syndrome, for short PMDS. PMDS is basically where males have normal external organs but they have female internal organs like a uterus and fallopian tubes. Males with PMDS like me can bear children and yes, we have periods like women.

    My parents and I found out about this when I was 13. During that time, I started having really bad stomach cramps and I started seeing blood coming out from my you know where. After sending me to the hospital, the doctor told us that I have PMDS and that was when my whole life changed. My parents started mistreating me, especially my father. After knowing the news, he would curse and would call me disgusting names like ‘filthy creature’, ‘abnormal’, ‘not a man’ and many more which I don’t want to think about. He would always blame me for bringing misfortune to the family. It was to the point where instead of calling me names, he would hit me. He vented his anger by hitting and abusing me.

   I remember there was once when I’m 15, my father came home late from work. I was peeking out from my bedroom to see him walk in and he caught my eyes. Before I knew it, he started hitting me with anything that he could get a hold on: books, picture frames and a glass bottle he found on the kitchen table. I was trying to block myself from his attacks but I was too weak and eventually I got hit with a glass bottle. My vision was covered with blood and I fell onto the ground, lifelessly lying there and thinking if this was the end of me. Before I passed out, I could hear my mother’s cries and screams. I caught a glimpse of her crying and screaming my name while cradling me in her arms.

   Ever since this incident happened, my mother was way more protective than she was before and she was always there for me, making sure I was alright and happy. While for my father, he has gotten cold and distant with me. He didn’t call me names often but he would still hold grudges towards me, it’s like he doesn’t recognize me as his own son. All this torture because I was a man born with a woman’s internal organs.

   While for my mother, she couldn’t accept it at first but she slowly accepted it since I was her one and only son. She would always tell me that no matter what she would always be there for me. Because of me, she would always get into fights with my father, she wanted to talk some sense into him but she would always fail. Deep down in my heart, I knew that she did so because she loved me. Even after I graduated high school, she told me not to worry about going into college as she said she’ll pay for everything.

   I know my father won’t provide me any daily expenses and help pay the fees. Because of what my mother has done for me, I felt guilty as I felt like I couldn’t do anything to repay her. I knew before I graduated high school, I would catch her working several jobs just to make sure that we can live happily. Because of the guilt I felt, I would fall asleep crying most nights or I even got insomnia. My mother was always fearless and I found the will to keep on going and never giving up on her. My mother was the main reason why I’m still alive right now.