𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒

「 all can't forgive 」

"What do you want?" She asked, almost defeated. Because she knew why he was here, he was upset that he was turned away and Marlene got to stay. This was far from a good time.

"I came to see how you are," Sirius replied, looking at her drained expression. Letting out an amused hum, she merely shook her head and looked away. "What did you expect me to say?" He pushed, hoping she'd be the one to bring it up.

"I'm okay," Elle stated, looking at him with a vacant look on her face. The boy merely rolled his eyes as he folded his arms across his chest. "What do you want me to say?" She retorted as he pushed away from the sofa, hands moving to the ballet shoes.

"Still haven't given it up?" He changed the subject, hands ghosting against the fraying materials. She needed new point shoes desperately. The blonde looked down at his hands before looking back to his concentrated face. "They'll always have a hold on you. Won't they, Westbrook?"

The girl stepped back. Had he always been so cruel? Maybe it was just his bubbled over jealousy that had contorted into anger but she couldn't believe what he had implied. Looking at his face, he showed no remorse.

"What?" He said bluntly, moving closer to her. "It was only a few months ago when you almost broke all of your bones from the dancing and the corsets, you can't stand there and say you do it for yourself. Not anymore." Sirius reminded her and her lips pressed into a line. He was right and she hated it. Though her dancing was a comfort, she loved the pain that came with it. All the negativity she endured because it was 'socially acceptable'. "They got you good, didn't they?" He said, his hand pushing away a strand of her blonde curls as he cupped her face. Even with words so venomous, she couldn't help but lean into his touch. It was like all her problems just slipped away but she hated it. "Always a Westbrook."

"Rather bold coming from you," Eleanor flared up at him. "Black." She emphasised, feeling as the thumb that caressed her cheek halted. "Stings, doesn't it?" The girl hissed, hitting his hands away as she hurried out of the common room.

He had some nerve. But she paused halfway to the abandoned classroom, realising James was completely right. Look how easy it was to wind her up, get under her skin. A name upset her. But it wasn't just the name, was it? There was the years of neglect and abuse that riddled through the curves. Something that people wouldn't know unless you told them. And Sirius knew. Was she overreacting? It all didn't add together. Slamming the hatch down as she entered the classroom, she aggressively pulled on the point shoes. This was the only healthy way she could get out this pure rage that bubbled inside her. That way, she wouldn't be such a monster.

Control. No, it was punishment. Self inflicted punishment. Nobody else was there to inflict it anymore, she had to ground herself and this was the only way she knew how. Perfectionism. So, there she went. Over and over again. Her stepmother's words swirled through her head as she practiced. It was her hardest routine and she hadn't danced in over a month. But she wasn't going easy on herself. Definitely not. Crashing to the floor every so often as she landed harshly or her legs gave way, her tears streamed down her face in blissful chaos.

   "Stop it!" A voice called as she's pinned. Just the person she was thinking about. All of this was her fault. No, take accountability - she told herself. The hands of the redhead fell on the blonde as she dropped to the floor. "Eleanor, please." Her mother pulled her in as the girl sobbed.

   "You don't get it!" She shot back. "Love made you selfish and it's doing it to me to! They'll end up dead." She sobbed, recalling the book she read on Anthiens. Her or them.

   "You don't have to punish yourself for giving into love, it's in our nature." She spoke calmly, stroking her hair like she was a child again.

   "I can't control myself any other way!" Eleanor rationalised and that seemed to sink in for the redhead, her face almost horrified. She just sat back and let this happen.

   "Ella." The hatch pushed open, causing her to jolt away from her mother.

   "No, no, go away!" She shouted, pulling at her face aggressively as she tried to wipe her tears. "Leave me alone!" The blonde didn't even know who she was talking to anymore as she paced the room: her thoughts, her mother, or Sirius. "Stay away." Her voice cracked as she was suddenly glued to her spot by the arms that held her. She tried to push away but she couldn't, she just couldn't. The girl merely collapsed into his arms. Defeated. Look how easily she gave in. "Let me go..." Was all she could croak and he stepped back, still supporting her weight. "Always a Westbrook..." She mumbled, glaring at him with the most vacant eyes he'd ever seen...