The shoe exchange

Alex

I feel like I've been ran over by a Mack truck. My head is killing me and I know it's from stressing out about this dinner that I'm having with my parents tonight.

I tell myself that I'm being ridiculous  and that I shouldn't feel this way. But knowing how disappointed and heart broken I've made my mom feel over witnessing my horrible actions, leaves me with a sinking feeling in my chest.

My mom has always been there for me. She's raised me well, it's not her fault what I choose to do. I've made bad choices in my life and my mom has always been there for me, no matter what. I understand now that this particular choice of mine just required a little more tough love from her. I'll always be grateful that she's loved me through all of it.

Unlike Gabriella, I've always had someone guiding me and being there for me. Even though my dad pushed me away and treated me in a way a father should never treat their child, he was still there. I knew when my dad was being an asshole he still loved me and cared for me.

In his own ways at least.

I groan out loud and Gabriella looks at me with concern. "What's wrong?" She asks. She's in the kitchen making a peanut butter sandwich. I told her there was so much more in there to choose from, but she just shrugged her shoulders.

I guess old habits die hard. It's what she's use to and it'll take time for her to understand that there's nothing in this world she can't have. I'd give her the brightest stars out of the night sky if I could.

"My head's just hurting." I answer her from where I'm sitting on the couch. I massage my temples as I lean over and rest my elbows on my knees.

"You should try to stop stressing so much. I think you've got it embedded in your mind that something terrible is about to happen. I think the worst is over and you can relax now." She finishes her sandwich and comes to sit beside me. "It's okay, Alexander." She says softly.

I lean back on the couch and pull her into me, wrapping my arms around her waist tightly. "Thank you." I whisper into her hair and kiss the top of her head. "Thank you for always being here and helping me." I pull away so I can kiss her on her sweet lips. "Mmm, I think this is how I want to taste peanut butter from now on." I watch as her face contorts, like what I just said was disgusting. She scrunches her nose and I laugh. "What?"

"That's gross." She says shaking her head slowly.

"I don't think so." I say, kissing her again. Oh, yeah. I don't think it's gross at all.

We have a couple of hours left before we have to start getting ready to head over to my parents house tonight. I'm really not in the mood to go anywhere. All I wanted was a down day to spend with Gabriella. One day where we didn't have to worry about work or volunteering. She's actually off today, she was not happy about getting that call from Richard, but I definitely was.

Speaking of calls.

I pick up my ringing phone from off the coffee table and look at the name on the screen before answering. "Hey, mom." I say in surprise, not really expecting to hear from her. "What's going on?"

"Hello, dear. I know I told you dinner was going to be over here tonight, but If it's alright with you, we will have to come over there. Our oven has quit working for some reason." She stops to sigh. "We can order in if you'd like, but I think your dad was looking forward to coming over to your place." She informs me.

I'm not trying to be rude or selfish, it's just that I'm really not in the mood for company at all tonight for some reason. But, them coming here beats us having to go over there. "Yeah, sure. That's fine mom. Still on for the same time?" I ask her. I'm not cooking, I'll just order something and they can have take out here.